As I've been getting older, I find that I sometimes have trouble getting in the "Christmas spirit" like I did when I was a kid. Maybe it's just because when I was little, all Christmas meant to me really was the excitement of getting new stuff. You know, waking up and realizing you finally made it through the agonizingly long night, going downstairs to find the tree all lit up and a beautiful unknown haul of presents under it... that kind of stuff. I think decorations also seem more fun and festive when you're a little kid, and they certainly aren't just another task that needs to be completed. Anyway, Christmas was definitely joyful to me when I was a child, albeit possibly not for the right reasons.
Somewhere along the way, though, you start to realize that presents aren't always going to be enough. I've always known what Christmas is really all about (Linus in "A Charlie Brown Christmas" anyone?), but I think my young brain had a bad disconnect between that and what actually happened around Christmas. Good tidings of great joy=...presents?? Now, I realize of course that Jesus gave us the best gift and that's why we give gifts on Christmas, and I love giving gifts to people I love! All I know is, I was at the mall yesterday buying said gifts, and I left feeling depressed despite the fact that I got some really cool stuff I'm excited about giving.
Here's a poem I wrote most of a long time ago (and without thinking about Christmas) that describes some of my thoughts today:
Search Engine
A search for entertainment, from desire to forget
the pains already suffered and prevent the ones not yet,
a fight to disengage the mind and not to know, just feel:
we can only live when happy; deeper feelings we conceal.
So the cycle will increase just as it always has before,
an insatiable desire reaching out for more and more.
A search for education, to remember we aspire,
to learn why things aren’t working out through knowledge we acquire,
and so the mind is stretched while the emotions just congeal:
we trust only what we understand and nothing else is real.
But as we learn, the more we know at some things we must guess:
disillusionment reversed, reaching into less and less.
A search for something different, but what difference does it make
in a Nutri-sweet and plastic world where everything is fake?
Still the imitations indicate that real things do exist,
and they might be there for finding if we only can resist
the current that pulls down around and kills beneath the fall
to go through instead of under, to where truth is all in all.
I guess maybe I'm just tired of all the fakeness. I'm with Charlie Brown: Christmas is way too commercial. And man, if he was worried about that in the '60's, what would he say now? See, I'm all in favor of gifts, but I'm worried that we're skipping the part about honoring and remembering Jesus' gift and just using it as an excuse to go whole-hog into the materialism that is probably the #1 besetting vice of American culture. I know he would want us to celebrate his birth, but I can't help asking: is this how he would want us to do it?
It's this materialistic tendency, I think, that can make all the best things about Christmas the things that we end up hating. Maybe that's why I like How the Grinch Stole Christmas (both versions) more than almost any of my friends do. I identify with the Grinch! I also think the modern version is really on to something with this idea of Christmas as a search for something. Unfortunately, they chose to express that insight through the song, "Where are you, Christmas?", a song that is almost tolerable when that cute little who sings it, but completely insufferable when sung by Faith Hill or whoever it was in the credits. In any case, that song (like so many other secular songs) is inches away from being a Jesus song. It has an excellent grasp of a real problem... but then it offers a worthless solution.
The solution offered by the song is, however, close: it suggests saving Christmas by having love and joy in our hearts. Great, now how do I do that, especially when I have to go to the mall filled with shoppers that generally tend to seem much more angry than loving and workers that seem far more depressed than joyful? That could just be because I'm such a last minute shopper... but still. The key thing is, there's no way I can just generate these good feelings. In the terms of my poem above, I can't entertain myself into forgetting my pain, and I can't intellectualize it away. I desperately need a third option, but I find it obscured by a lot of fakeness and annoying decorations.
I'm not trying to be a downer here. I think the state of Christmas in America is pretty sad, but there is one thing I like about it: it gets people searching. It's also the one time every year when the gospel message gets on national tv (thank God for Linus!). Hopefully, when people get tired of the cheap imitations, they'll realize that the mere proliferation of imitations means there must be something real somewhere. There is real love to be had, and real joy comes with it. That's why all I really want to do this Christmas is worship God and spend time with people I love. What if we focused on that instead of making a part-time job out of managing/purchasing/looking for Christmas? As I'm trying to shift my focus, I'm noticing that the real joy and peace that are supposed to be associated with Christmas spirit have come to me from the Father and his love! Have we ever thought that maybe the "Christmas Spirit" should be the Holy Spirit? I ask because the Spirit is the one who reveals the Father's love and the joy of being saved by Jesus to us, and we'll never find Christmas until we find Christ.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Friday, December 11, 2009
Literary Lists
As we near the end of the year, it seems like all kinds of organizations are busy giving out awards. I'm not sure why we as humans have such a compulsion to do this, but awards are everywhere. Most Valuable Player. Best Picture. Employee of the Month.
Ok, maybe not that last one so much (as Demetri Martin says, "Employee of the month is a great example of how someone can be a winner and a loser at the same time"), but we do love to give each other awards. Maybe we like it because it makes us feel safe or because if we praise another person's efforts, we feel justified in soaking in everyone's admiration when we do something praiseworthy. Maybe we're just an awful lot like Wemmicks.
Anyway, I'll leave any further commentary on why we do the whole award thing and its ramifications to the Wemmicks. If you don't know what those are, you'll be doing yourself a favor if you find out and read about them, trust me. For now, the thing that got me inspired to write this entry is a specific aspect of the awards process. A lot of awards, particularly in sports and entertainment, have finalists. Instead of voting between every single football player, for example, a group of finalists is selected to be voted on. These select few qualifiers are the cream of the crop from which the eventual award-winner is sure to be chosen.
But really, I'm not sure why we always have to narrow it all the way down to just one winner. I actually kind of like the idea of recognizing the top 3 or so entrants in a category as all being excellent. And besides, I don't have delusions of grandeur so bad that I think I have any authority to confer any big awards. I do, however, like sharing things I enjoy with others. Also, I wouldn't want to share only one thing in a category, when there are several I like. I think the idea of a top 3 is much nicer :)
So, today's category is: literature! Despite the fact that my house is nearly being overrun by them, I still really like books (and reading in general). As I sit in my room and look at the books I have while I type, I see several different categories emerging. I'll give you a top three books or authors in various genres for you to check out if you want, along with brief explanations for my choices. Also, feel free to tell me about your picks: just click on the comments link at the bottom of the post. And the categories are:
Books of the Bible:
(note: I realize this may be slightly heretical since all of Scripture is equally valid and inspired [see 2 Tim. 3:16]. However, I wanted to include the Bible in these lists and lumping any other books with it in a category is even more blasphemous! So, these are just the books of it that have meant the most to me in my journey so far, not that they are any better or worse than any others.)
1. Psalms-- I almost always feel that the prayers of David and the other psalmists are the cries of my own heart. I have taken more encouragement from this book than any other, by far. Plus, the poetry of it is beautiful, which is another plus since I love poetry. I could go on about this book forever, but I'll just say that you could do much worse than starting each day with a psalm. That's what I do.
2. Colossians-- As you may have noticed from my recent posts, I just keep coming back to this one. It's so simple, yet the challenges in it are more than we can master in a lifetime. I like how it takes all of Paul's theological prowess and just brings it right to the bottom line.
3. Matthew-- The story of Jesus' life is indispensable, because he is the model we are supposed to follow. Add to that the Sermon on the Mount, a great assortment of parables and miracles, and you've got yourself a book you can live by.
Nonfiction Authors:
1. C.S. Lewis-- Put simply, the man's prose style is unparallelled (in fiction or nonfiction). His thoughtful yet extremely readable expositions of doctrine and faith put him squarely at the top of my list. Even when I disagree with him, reading his words makes me glad to be associated with Christianity.
2. Dan Allender-- His books have been a huge help to me in navigating the messy and henceforth largely unknown world that is my emotions. He is quite insightful and able to cut through confusion to a strong central point.
3. Wayne Grudem-- Known mostly for his Systematic Theology, this guy is very definitely systematic. I don't know of a better teacher for doctrine and theology. Also, I probably identify with him so well because of his exhaustively analytical and logical style. Some have said that I am, in fact, a bit analytical myself. Maybe.
Fiction Series:
1. The Lord of the Rings trilogy, plus the Hobbit and Silmarillion (J.R.R. Tolkien)-- Anyone who knows me even a little should have seen this one coming a mile away. The breadth and depth of this story is amazing, and I think it holds some valuable spiritual lessons as well. Where it really succeeds, I think, is in creating a world with its own hidden lore that feels as if it really existed and could be explored further if you could just find some more books about it. I don't believe it can ever be matched.
2. The Sherlock Holmes mysteries (Arthur Conan Doyle)-- I've always loved mysteries, and there really aren't any better than these. Finely crafted, suspenseful, and funny as well, they are the perfect reading for a dark and stormy night.
3. The Time quartet (Madeleine L'Engle)-- I know, I know, you were probably expecting the Chronicles of Narnia in this spot. They are great, but there's seven of them and I only really love three, plus C.S. Lewis already made the finals on another list. So, how about A Wrinkle in Time and its companion stories about the wonderful Murry family? The strange fantasy world of these stories is truly fantastic, and I really like the mind-bending plots as well. And despite the fact that they get a bit mystical, there are some solid spiritual lessons to be found here as well. A dark horse favorite of mine, and really worth reading.
Poets:
1. Robert Frost-- My all-time favorite, and unmatched master of making rhymed poetry profound and haunting. He was truly a craftsman, and the way he blends form and content is inspiring to me as a poet. There will never be anything like his poetry as far as I can tell.
2. Mark Strand-- A more contemporary poet whose work I think will stand the test of time and one day rise above the rest of his generation to be included in the canon of great literature. He sees life from a different angle, and he shows it to us beautifully and with just the right amount of words.
3. John Donne-- Kind of an old-timer, but absolutely unrivaled in spiritual depth and density. I'm not sure anyone ever has or will work so much theology into poetry so successfully. His poems can be a bit of a puzzle, especially due to slightly antiquated language and convoluted syntax, but the knots are always worth untying.
Children's Authors:
1. Shel Silverstein-- I could have easily included him on the poets list as well, but his pictures and poems together are what really make him unique. They've been making me laugh for years. You have to watch out, though, because right in the midst of all the humor he sometimes says something so poignant and profound that you can go from laughing to crying before you know it if you aren't careful. Quite an achievement, if you ask me.
2. Dr. Seuss (aka Theodore Geisel)-- These books are just classics. They have a charm and offbeat humor to them that really sets them apart, both in the words and pictures. Also, I challenge anyone to read the last page of Fox in Socks correctly the first time through without laughing. I'm not sure it can be done, but I love it.
3. Donald Sobol-- Wait, who? Another guy whose creation's name (Encyclopedia Brown) became more famous than his own. Maybe it just happens to mystery writers a lot. Anyway, as I said, I love mysteries, and these were my favorite as a young kid. They don't always seem too baffling now, but at the time they were just the right kind of challenge, and I identified with the main character. I get nostalgic just thinking about these stories.
Children's Authors (Picture book subdivision):
(note: call me childish, but I still love kids' books, and I wanted to include some more. These coming ones, while they do have words, are most memorable for their amazing pictures.)
1. James Gurney-- Creator of the Dinotopia series, which is actually quite a memorable set of stories as well. However, I know for a fact I will always think first of the astonishing pictures of this island of dinosaurs whenever these books are mentioned. It is so beautiful that I won't even waste my time trying to describe it.
2. Graeme Base-- His fanciful and fun picture books with their poetic accompanying stories are some of the most lasting memories of my childhood. Beautiful artwork, funny writing, and a touch of mystery: a perfect combination.
3. Martin Handford-- Not so much an author, I suppose, as an illustrator, but I'm pretty sure his Where's Waldo books can claim more of my time than any other picture books. I spent countless hours searching for Waldo, the Wizard Whitebeard, Woof, and the various other characters, and I loved every minute. The drawings are still very cool (and hilarious) to me now.
And last, but not least,
Comic Strips:
1. Calvin and Hobbes (Bill Watterson)-- As I mentioned previously in the post announcing its arrival at the bottom of my blog, this is without question the finest comic strip ever created. It is so far and away above its competitors in my mind that this is one category I almost did just pick a winner in. By way of my promised further explanation, the main reasons I think this strip is so great are that it's extremely funny while also being very smart, while also remaining truly real (even though Hobbes' reality is purposefully never resolved). I love Calvin's immense vocabulary (for anyone, but especially for a six-year-old), and his immature take on the big questions of life, which are somehow still profound even in the midst of being hilarious. I can't even really explain how this was pulled off, I just know it was. The artwork is fantastic too, especially when any of Calvin's alter-egos (Spaceman Spiff, Tracer Bullet, Stupendous Man) enters the scene or when Calvin's imagination (think dinosaurs) is allowed to run wild. All told, the sheer quality of this comic makes reading today's pathetic comics page kind of depressing, but it's so worth it.
2. The Far Side (Gary Larson)-- This is one of the strangest and therefore funniest comics ever, to be sure. The one-panel design has its limitations, but they are actually used to their fullest capacity. It's bizarre and unexpected, but that makes it great. Also, it was really the first media of any sort that I know of to tap into the innate humor of the cow. Enough said.
3. Peanuts (Charles Schulz)-- It should really say something about the quality of this comic that it's still running long after its creator's death. I know it trailed off a bit at the end, but the early ones really were funny and endearing like few other comics have been. No list of comics would be complete without this strip. Its characters are iconic and its enjoyment timeless. Now enough of this listing... I want to go watch a Charlie Brown Christmas!
Ok, maybe not that last one so much (as Demetri Martin says, "Employee of the month is a great example of how someone can be a winner and a loser at the same time"), but we do love to give each other awards. Maybe we like it because it makes us feel safe or because if we praise another person's efforts, we feel justified in soaking in everyone's admiration when we do something praiseworthy. Maybe we're just an awful lot like Wemmicks.
Anyway, I'll leave any further commentary on why we do the whole award thing and its ramifications to the Wemmicks. If you don't know what those are, you'll be doing yourself a favor if you find out and read about them, trust me. For now, the thing that got me inspired to write this entry is a specific aspect of the awards process. A lot of awards, particularly in sports and entertainment, have finalists. Instead of voting between every single football player, for example, a group of finalists is selected to be voted on. These select few qualifiers are the cream of the crop from which the eventual award-winner is sure to be chosen.
But really, I'm not sure why we always have to narrow it all the way down to just one winner. I actually kind of like the idea of recognizing the top 3 or so entrants in a category as all being excellent. And besides, I don't have delusions of grandeur so bad that I think I have any authority to confer any big awards. I do, however, like sharing things I enjoy with others. Also, I wouldn't want to share only one thing in a category, when there are several I like. I think the idea of a top 3 is much nicer :)
So, today's category is: literature! Despite the fact that my house is nearly being overrun by them, I still really like books (and reading in general). As I sit in my room and look at the books I have while I type, I see several different categories emerging. I'll give you a top three books or authors in various genres for you to check out if you want, along with brief explanations for my choices. Also, feel free to tell me about your picks: just click on the comments link at the bottom of the post. And the categories are:
Books of the Bible:
(note: I realize this may be slightly heretical since all of Scripture is equally valid and inspired [see 2 Tim. 3:16]. However, I wanted to include the Bible in these lists and lumping any other books with it in a category is even more blasphemous! So, these are just the books of it that have meant the most to me in my journey so far, not that they are any better or worse than any others.)
1. Psalms-- I almost always feel that the prayers of David and the other psalmists are the cries of my own heart. I have taken more encouragement from this book than any other, by far. Plus, the poetry of it is beautiful, which is another plus since I love poetry. I could go on about this book forever, but I'll just say that you could do much worse than starting each day with a psalm. That's what I do.
2. Colossians-- As you may have noticed from my recent posts, I just keep coming back to this one. It's so simple, yet the challenges in it are more than we can master in a lifetime. I like how it takes all of Paul's theological prowess and just brings it right to the bottom line.
3. Matthew-- The story of Jesus' life is indispensable, because he is the model we are supposed to follow. Add to that the Sermon on the Mount, a great assortment of parables and miracles, and you've got yourself a book you can live by.
Nonfiction Authors:
1. C.S. Lewis-- Put simply, the man's prose style is unparallelled (in fiction or nonfiction). His thoughtful yet extremely readable expositions of doctrine and faith put him squarely at the top of my list. Even when I disagree with him, reading his words makes me glad to be associated with Christianity.
2. Dan Allender-- His books have been a huge help to me in navigating the messy and henceforth largely unknown world that is my emotions. He is quite insightful and able to cut through confusion to a strong central point.
3. Wayne Grudem-- Known mostly for his Systematic Theology, this guy is very definitely systematic. I don't know of a better teacher for doctrine and theology. Also, I probably identify with him so well because of his exhaustively analytical and logical style. Some have said that I am, in fact, a bit analytical myself. Maybe.
Fiction Series:
1. The Lord of the Rings trilogy, plus the Hobbit and Silmarillion (J.R.R. Tolkien)-- Anyone who knows me even a little should have seen this one coming a mile away. The breadth and depth of this story is amazing, and I think it holds some valuable spiritual lessons as well. Where it really succeeds, I think, is in creating a world with its own hidden lore that feels as if it really existed and could be explored further if you could just find some more books about it. I don't believe it can ever be matched.
2. The Sherlock Holmes mysteries (Arthur Conan Doyle)-- I've always loved mysteries, and there really aren't any better than these. Finely crafted, suspenseful, and funny as well, they are the perfect reading for a dark and stormy night.
3. The Time quartet (Madeleine L'Engle)-- I know, I know, you were probably expecting the Chronicles of Narnia in this spot. They are great, but there's seven of them and I only really love three, plus C.S. Lewis already made the finals on another list. So, how about A Wrinkle in Time and its companion stories about the wonderful Murry family? The strange fantasy world of these stories is truly fantastic, and I really like the mind-bending plots as well. And despite the fact that they get a bit mystical, there are some solid spiritual lessons to be found here as well. A dark horse favorite of mine, and really worth reading.
Poets:
1. Robert Frost-- My all-time favorite, and unmatched master of making rhymed poetry profound and haunting. He was truly a craftsman, and the way he blends form and content is inspiring to me as a poet. There will never be anything like his poetry as far as I can tell.
2. Mark Strand-- A more contemporary poet whose work I think will stand the test of time and one day rise above the rest of his generation to be included in the canon of great literature. He sees life from a different angle, and he shows it to us beautifully and with just the right amount of words.
3. John Donne-- Kind of an old-timer, but absolutely unrivaled in spiritual depth and density. I'm not sure anyone ever has or will work so much theology into poetry so successfully. His poems can be a bit of a puzzle, especially due to slightly antiquated language and convoluted syntax, but the knots are always worth untying.
Children's Authors:
1. Shel Silverstein-- I could have easily included him on the poets list as well, but his pictures and poems together are what really make him unique. They've been making me laugh for years. You have to watch out, though, because right in the midst of all the humor he sometimes says something so poignant and profound that you can go from laughing to crying before you know it if you aren't careful. Quite an achievement, if you ask me.
2. Dr. Seuss (aka Theodore Geisel)-- These books are just classics. They have a charm and offbeat humor to them that really sets them apart, both in the words and pictures. Also, I challenge anyone to read the last page of Fox in Socks correctly the first time through without laughing. I'm not sure it can be done, but I love it.
3. Donald Sobol-- Wait, who? Another guy whose creation's name (Encyclopedia Brown) became more famous than his own. Maybe it just happens to mystery writers a lot. Anyway, as I said, I love mysteries, and these were my favorite as a young kid. They don't always seem too baffling now, but at the time they were just the right kind of challenge, and I identified with the main character. I get nostalgic just thinking about these stories.
Children's Authors (Picture book subdivision):
(note: call me childish, but I still love kids' books, and I wanted to include some more. These coming ones, while they do have words, are most memorable for their amazing pictures.)
1. James Gurney-- Creator of the Dinotopia series, which is actually quite a memorable set of stories as well. However, I know for a fact I will always think first of the astonishing pictures of this island of dinosaurs whenever these books are mentioned. It is so beautiful that I won't even waste my time trying to describe it.
2. Graeme Base-- His fanciful and fun picture books with their poetic accompanying stories are some of the most lasting memories of my childhood. Beautiful artwork, funny writing, and a touch of mystery: a perfect combination.
3. Martin Handford-- Not so much an author, I suppose, as an illustrator, but I'm pretty sure his Where's Waldo books can claim more of my time than any other picture books. I spent countless hours searching for Waldo, the Wizard Whitebeard, Woof, and the various other characters, and I loved every minute. The drawings are still very cool (and hilarious) to me now.
And last, but not least,
Comic Strips:
1. Calvin and Hobbes (Bill Watterson)-- As I mentioned previously in the post announcing its arrival at the bottom of my blog, this is without question the finest comic strip ever created. It is so far and away above its competitors in my mind that this is one category I almost did just pick a winner in. By way of my promised further explanation, the main reasons I think this strip is so great are that it's extremely funny while also being very smart, while also remaining truly real (even though Hobbes' reality is purposefully never resolved). I love Calvin's immense vocabulary (for anyone, but especially for a six-year-old), and his immature take on the big questions of life, which are somehow still profound even in the midst of being hilarious. I can't even really explain how this was pulled off, I just know it was. The artwork is fantastic too, especially when any of Calvin's alter-egos (Spaceman Spiff, Tracer Bullet, Stupendous Man) enters the scene or when Calvin's imagination (think dinosaurs) is allowed to run wild. All told, the sheer quality of this comic makes reading today's pathetic comics page kind of depressing, but it's so worth it.
2. The Far Side (Gary Larson)-- This is one of the strangest and therefore funniest comics ever, to be sure. The one-panel design has its limitations, but they are actually used to their fullest capacity. It's bizarre and unexpected, but that makes it great. Also, it was really the first media of any sort that I know of to tap into the innate humor of the cow. Enough said.
3. Peanuts (Charles Schulz)-- It should really say something about the quality of this comic that it's still running long after its creator's death. I know it trailed off a bit at the end, but the early ones really were funny and endearing like few other comics have been. No list of comics would be complete without this strip. Its characters are iconic and its enjoyment timeless. Now enough of this listing... I want to go watch a Charlie Brown Christmas!
Monday, November 30, 2009
The Law and the Spirit
One of the great things I'm finding about reading the Bible is that it helps me deal with the craziness inherent in life. What I'm saying is, if we really walked in the true implications of its teachings, I think our lives would make a lot more sense. For example, I read this verse the other day that blew me right out of the water. I mean, I knew it was in there, but I had never really thought about it before or what it would really mean if I lived like it was true.
Side note: isn't it easy when you're reading to take in words and yet no meaning whatsoever? We have to stop doing this with the Bible. When we're young, too many of us get trained to read the Word in whole chapters, like a textbook. I say read as small a chunk as necessary so that you really wrestle with the meaning of what you read. Only after you do that will reading whole chapters make any sense! Ok... that's the end of my tangent, but unfortunately it really broke up the flow of where I was going. Here's what you should do: go back to the top and read that first paragraph again, but this time skip this whole tangential paragraph and move on to the next one when you get done.
Anyway, here's the verse: "God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having cancelled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross" (Colossians 2:13-14). Do you hear how radical that is? The law, that written code we could never succeed in keeping and therefore opposed us, is cancelled! Ended. Voided. Xed (bonus points if you get that reference). Nullified. Removed. And I could keep going like a thesaurus, but I don't need to because just in case any of those words aren't strong enough for you, the verse says the law is also nailed to the cross of Christ!
It's not just this one verse either. Now that I've spent some time thinking about it and searching further, this idea of the cancelled law is found throughout the New Testament. The story certainly doesn't end there, though. Let me connect some more dots in this constellation before I try to make a point from it.
So, according to this crazy verse, the law is crucified on Jesus' cross. That got me thinking, what else died on that cross? Short answer: I did. "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me" (Galatians 2:20). It kind of puts a damper on the joy that the law is dead to find out that I'm dead too. Thankfully, the story doesn't end there either.
I may be dead, but that verse does seem to give me some hope of life through Christ because Jesus didn't stay dead but rose again. The apostle Paul (who wrote all these books I'm quoting, by the way) agrees elsewhere in his writings: "Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him... The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus" (Romans 6:8,10-11). So what really died?
Sin in me died, so that Christ could take its place. The NIV really mistranslates this concept as the "sinful nature" dying, but a better term is "the flesh," the part of me that is not my spirit. So really, it's just a flesh wound! (I've had worse... No you haven't! Your arm's off! ...Ahem... many apologies to anyone who hasn't seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail). Anyway, this idea of the crucified flesh is what's important here. Paul says later on that "if you live according to the sinful nature [flesh], you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God" (Romans 8:13-14). The idea of us being dead, then, is so that we will be led by the Spirit.
The verse that brings this whole thing full circle is Galatians 5:18-- "If you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law"!! I know the actual verse ends with a period, but I couldn't resist adding some exclamation marks (notice how they're outside the quotation marks). I just can't believe how Paul makes this unbelievably radical statement so matter-of-factly. Of course the written code is cancelled! How could it not be? It's like he's saying we should already know this stuff!
And really, we should. Maybe we even do, but how many of us live like it? I think the church in general and most of us individually are pretty stuck on the law. We are very concerned with our outward appearances and doing the right things, but where is the concern for the spirit? Is there even a point to changing people's outward morality if the heart underneath remains unchanged, not under God's control?
I don't really know, and I'm not trying to suggest that sin is unimportant in light of the law being cancelled. People made that mistake in Paul's day, and they were badly missing his point. "What then? Shall we sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Don't you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey-- whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?" (Romans 6:15-16). The gravity and importance of sin is not just that some law says not to do it. It is serious because it enslaves us and eventually destroys us.
We are meant, though, to be slaves to righteousness. This is tough language, and I think this has a lot to do with why many Christians balk at the idea of the law being completely cancelled. We are faced with this unsettling dichotomy in Galatians 5:18. Either we are led by the Spirit, or we are under the law. There is no in-between space.
Here's where it gets tricky. Think about the difference between the law and the Spirit for a minute. The law is made of rules that apply to certain situations. If someone makes me mad, I shouldn't kill that person. Ok, got it. I'm extremely attracted to this person, but I didn't sleep with them. Check. Success, as far as the law goes. Apart from these few rules, I am free to do as I please. But being led by the Spirit is much different. He wants to lead us in ALL situations! Do whatever you do in the name of the Lord, remember? 100%. Being led by the Spirit means constantly seeking his direction and submitting to his leading in everything, even the things we would much rather control ourselves.
That, my friends, is hard. There's no getting around it. I'm terrible at it, and I assume you are too. I'm getting better I think (hope), but I still want to keep some areas of my life for myself. That's why we tend to go back to the law. We are not bound by it, but we bind ourselves to it because it seems easier. If we have a rule we can follow for difficult situations, we feel like we will be able to follow it and save ourselves. We want to earn salvation instead of just being saved. We feel like we will be able to keep the rules well enough to meet the standard. It's not true, of course, but it's what we believe. The rules seem easier than laying our lives completely at the feet of God, listening to his voice and letting him direct us in all situations.
Maybe we just misunderstand holiness. I was at my church's men's retreat recently, and we talked a lot about sexual purity. The speaker offered a lot of insight into how to live a pure life, but in my mind the single most important thing he said was that holiness is active, directional. It IS action! It's about what we do, not all the things we don't do. And how in the world do we expect to know what to do unless we let ourselves be led by the Spirit? The rules just don't provide enough guidance.
It's kind of like walking blindfold between two electrified wires. You could do your best to walk straight and wait until you get zapped to change course. That's life under the law, the wires being the rules and associated judgments. Or, you could let someone who knows how to see lead your every step, trusting that he knows the best path and won't let you stray into pain. That's what the Spirit does for us. "Now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life" (Romans 6:22).
It's directional. It's all-encompassing. It's eternal life. It seems a little crazy in our human understanding, but it's so good. That's God for you :)
Side note: isn't it easy when you're reading to take in words and yet no meaning whatsoever? We have to stop doing this with the Bible. When we're young, too many of us get trained to read the Word in whole chapters, like a textbook. I say read as small a chunk as necessary so that you really wrestle with the meaning of what you read. Only after you do that will reading whole chapters make any sense! Ok... that's the end of my tangent, but unfortunately it really broke up the flow of where I was going. Here's what you should do: go back to the top and read that first paragraph again, but this time skip this whole tangential paragraph and move on to the next one when you get done.
Anyway, here's the verse: "God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having cancelled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross" (Colossians 2:13-14). Do you hear how radical that is? The law, that written code we could never succeed in keeping and therefore opposed us, is cancelled! Ended. Voided. Xed (bonus points if you get that reference). Nullified. Removed. And I could keep going like a thesaurus, but I don't need to because just in case any of those words aren't strong enough for you, the verse says the law is also nailed to the cross of Christ!
It's not just this one verse either. Now that I've spent some time thinking about it and searching further, this idea of the cancelled law is found throughout the New Testament. The story certainly doesn't end there, though. Let me connect some more dots in this constellation before I try to make a point from it.
So, according to this crazy verse, the law is crucified on Jesus' cross. That got me thinking, what else died on that cross? Short answer: I did. "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me" (Galatians 2:20). It kind of puts a damper on the joy that the law is dead to find out that I'm dead too. Thankfully, the story doesn't end there either.
I may be dead, but that verse does seem to give me some hope of life through Christ because Jesus didn't stay dead but rose again. The apostle Paul (who wrote all these books I'm quoting, by the way) agrees elsewhere in his writings: "Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him... The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus" (Romans 6:8,10-11). So what really died?
Sin in me died, so that Christ could take its place. The NIV really mistranslates this concept as the "sinful nature" dying, but a better term is "the flesh," the part of me that is not my spirit. So really, it's just a flesh wound! (I've had worse... No you haven't! Your arm's off! ...Ahem... many apologies to anyone who hasn't seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail). Anyway, this idea of the crucified flesh is what's important here. Paul says later on that "if you live according to the sinful nature [flesh], you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God" (Romans 8:13-14). The idea of us being dead, then, is so that we will be led by the Spirit.
The verse that brings this whole thing full circle is Galatians 5:18-- "If you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law"!! I know the actual verse ends with a period, but I couldn't resist adding some exclamation marks (notice how they're outside the quotation marks). I just can't believe how Paul makes this unbelievably radical statement so matter-of-factly. Of course the written code is cancelled! How could it not be? It's like he's saying we should already know this stuff!
And really, we should. Maybe we even do, but how many of us live like it? I think the church in general and most of us individually are pretty stuck on the law. We are very concerned with our outward appearances and doing the right things, but where is the concern for the spirit? Is there even a point to changing people's outward morality if the heart underneath remains unchanged, not under God's control?
I don't really know, and I'm not trying to suggest that sin is unimportant in light of the law being cancelled. People made that mistake in Paul's day, and they were badly missing his point. "What then? Shall we sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Don't you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey-- whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?" (Romans 6:15-16). The gravity and importance of sin is not just that some law says not to do it. It is serious because it enslaves us and eventually destroys us.
We are meant, though, to be slaves to righteousness. This is tough language, and I think this has a lot to do with why many Christians balk at the idea of the law being completely cancelled. We are faced with this unsettling dichotomy in Galatians 5:18. Either we are led by the Spirit, or we are under the law. There is no in-between space.
Here's where it gets tricky. Think about the difference between the law and the Spirit for a minute. The law is made of rules that apply to certain situations. If someone makes me mad, I shouldn't kill that person. Ok, got it. I'm extremely attracted to this person, but I didn't sleep with them. Check. Success, as far as the law goes. Apart from these few rules, I am free to do as I please. But being led by the Spirit is much different. He wants to lead us in ALL situations! Do whatever you do in the name of the Lord, remember? 100%. Being led by the Spirit means constantly seeking his direction and submitting to his leading in everything, even the things we would much rather control ourselves.
That, my friends, is hard. There's no getting around it. I'm terrible at it, and I assume you are too. I'm getting better I think (hope), but I still want to keep some areas of my life for myself. That's why we tend to go back to the law. We are not bound by it, but we bind ourselves to it because it seems easier. If we have a rule we can follow for difficult situations, we feel like we will be able to follow it and save ourselves. We want to earn salvation instead of just being saved. We feel like we will be able to keep the rules well enough to meet the standard. It's not true, of course, but it's what we believe. The rules seem easier than laying our lives completely at the feet of God, listening to his voice and letting him direct us in all situations.
Maybe we just misunderstand holiness. I was at my church's men's retreat recently, and we talked a lot about sexual purity. The speaker offered a lot of insight into how to live a pure life, but in my mind the single most important thing he said was that holiness is active, directional. It IS action! It's about what we do, not all the things we don't do. And how in the world do we expect to know what to do unless we let ourselves be led by the Spirit? The rules just don't provide enough guidance.
It's kind of like walking blindfold between two electrified wires. You could do your best to walk straight and wait until you get zapped to change course. That's life under the law, the wires being the rules and associated judgments. Or, you could let someone who knows how to see lead your every step, trusting that he knows the best path and won't let you stray into pain. That's what the Spirit does for us. "Now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life" (Romans 6:22).
It's directional. It's all-encompassing. It's eternal life. It seems a little crazy in our human understanding, but it's so good. That's God for you :)
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Streetlights Playlist
Recently I've been asking the Lord kind of a strange question: "God, what do I like to do?"
I realize that might sound a little bit crazy, but the fact of the matter is that I've spent a lot of time worrying about what everyone else thinks and what they like me to do and be. So much, in fact, that I had actually lost sight of what I myself actually like to do. I know I talked a bit about this in a previous entry, but I've been trying to figure out what I actually care about as part of discovering my identity.
See, what I'm guessing is that the things I care really deeply about are things that God has placed in me for a reason, things he wants me to do something with. The part I'm still learning about is slicing through the fallen brokenness on top of all those things in order to find what's underneath.
Anyway, one of the things God has shown me that I really like to do and care about is music. That is a pretty broad category, but I still think that's the best way for me to put it. I love listening to almost all music, and I also like making music in any possible way. I have a song in my head constantly (although I unfortunately have no control over which one it is at any given moment), and I'm always humming, whistling, singing, playing or making a beat to something! So, I think God has given me this passion to glorify him.
The most obvious expression of that passion in action would be worship, which is a great way that I can use music for God's glory. I don't think worship is limited to my own singing or playing, though, which got me thinking about my music collection. I've noticed for awhile now that the idea of streetlights is a theme in the music I like to listen to, so I started looking through my library for any song that has to do with that. I found more than I was even expecting! Therefore, I'm pleased to announce and share with you my Streetlights playlist. All these songs either talk directly about streetlights (i.e. use that specific word) or otherwise remind me of Ephesians 5:8-14, my theme verse for this blog (and life in general really-- see first entry). Here it is:
1. Work: Jars of Clay
2. Sleeping In: Nevertheless
3. Illuminate: Project 86
4. Far & Gone: Day of Fire
5. Serial Sleepers: House of Heroes
6. Oh! Gravity: Switchfoot
7. Turn On the Lights: Sanctus Real
8. Shine With Me: P.O.D.
9. Sandbox Praise: Pax217
10. Burn For You: TobyMac (feat. Double Dutch)
11. Murexa: Falling Up
12. Shine: Newsboys
13. Sleeper: Everyday Sunday
14. I Need Love: Sixpence None the Richer
15. In the Light: dc Talk
16. Broken: Lifehouse
17. Light Up Ahead: Further Seems Forever
18. This Love: Stavesacre
I'm actually listening to this playlist as I write this, and it really encourages me, so I hope it can do the same for you. As it turns out, this playlist is almost exactly one 70 minute CD worth of fantastic music. If anyone is interested in hearing it, I would be glad to burn you a CD (which, by the way, is actually legal if it has no more than one song from any album. Record labels see it as free advertising rather than a copyright violation! And trust me, once you hear this music, you'll be interested in buying more of these artists' stuff). Also, I'm sure many of these songs can be viewed/listened to on Youtube, so check some of them out!
I'll finish with one more verse that has to do with the streetlight call. This verse seems to run through all the songs here as well, and it has inspired me for many years, since even before I thought about the idea of streetlights. Matthew 5:14-16-- "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."
So it all comes back to worship in the end. Really, that right there is who I am, and who you are. Let that be my song.
I realize that might sound a little bit crazy, but the fact of the matter is that I've spent a lot of time worrying about what everyone else thinks and what they like me to do and be. So much, in fact, that I had actually lost sight of what I myself actually like to do. I know I talked a bit about this in a previous entry, but I've been trying to figure out what I actually care about as part of discovering my identity.
See, what I'm guessing is that the things I care really deeply about are things that God has placed in me for a reason, things he wants me to do something with. The part I'm still learning about is slicing through the fallen brokenness on top of all those things in order to find what's underneath.
Anyway, one of the things God has shown me that I really like to do and care about is music. That is a pretty broad category, but I still think that's the best way for me to put it. I love listening to almost all music, and I also like making music in any possible way. I have a song in my head constantly (although I unfortunately have no control over which one it is at any given moment), and I'm always humming, whistling, singing, playing or making a beat to something! So, I think God has given me this passion to glorify him.
The most obvious expression of that passion in action would be worship, which is a great way that I can use music for God's glory. I don't think worship is limited to my own singing or playing, though, which got me thinking about my music collection. I've noticed for awhile now that the idea of streetlights is a theme in the music I like to listen to, so I started looking through my library for any song that has to do with that. I found more than I was even expecting! Therefore, I'm pleased to announce and share with you my Streetlights playlist. All these songs either talk directly about streetlights (i.e. use that specific word) or otherwise remind me of Ephesians 5:8-14, my theme verse for this blog (and life in general really-- see first entry). Here it is:
1. Work: Jars of Clay
2. Sleeping In: Nevertheless
3. Illuminate: Project 86
4. Far & Gone: Day of Fire
5. Serial Sleepers: House of Heroes
6. Oh! Gravity: Switchfoot
7. Turn On the Lights: Sanctus Real
8. Shine With Me: P.O.D.
9. Sandbox Praise: Pax217
10. Burn For You: TobyMac (feat. Double Dutch)
11. Murexa: Falling Up
12. Shine: Newsboys
13. Sleeper: Everyday Sunday
14. I Need Love: Sixpence None the Richer
15. In the Light: dc Talk
16. Broken: Lifehouse
17. Light Up Ahead: Further Seems Forever
18. This Love: Stavesacre
I'm actually listening to this playlist as I write this, and it really encourages me, so I hope it can do the same for you. As it turns out, this playlist is almost exactly one 70 minute CD worth of fantastic music. If anyone is interested in hearing it, I would be glad to burn you a CD (which, by the way, is actually legal if it has no more than one song from any album. Record labels see it as free advertising rather than a copyright violation! And trust me, once you hear this music, you'll be interested in buying more of these artists' stuff). Also, I'm sure many of these songs can be viewed/listened to on Youtube, so check some of them out!
I'll finish with one more verse that has to do with the streetlight call. This verse seems to run through all the songs here as well, and it has inspired me for many years, since even before I thought about the idea of streetlights. Matthew 5:14-16-- "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."
So it all comes back to worship in the end. Really, that right there is who I am, and who you are. Let that be my song.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Such as these
I have just a few very simple yet challenging thoughts circulating in my head today. Normally my posts tend to be pretty long and involved, but today I'm not thinking that will happen. Sometimes, I think the power of insights can be lost when too many words are used. I mean, look at Jesus and the way he taught. He didn't spell things out to the last detail for people. In fact, he often left them wishing that he would explain more fully and wondering why he wouldn't. But, by leaving his teachings as they were without over-explaining, I think Jesus encourages us to go back to things and ponder them ourselves. Then, we have to engage our minds and search for him, which brings him glory. "It is the glory of God to conceal a matter; to search out a matter is the glory of kings," (i.e. us!) Proverbs 25:2.
I think that the teachings of Jesus most emblematic of this concealed style or strategy on his part are the beatitudes. They seem so simple on the surface, even as a group, but each one of them is deep enough to study for a week... or eight... or more! The one I've been thinking about recently, along with many people from the house of prayer, is the first of them, Matthew 5:3. It says, "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."
What does it mean to be poor in spirit? More than I could ever address in a blog entry, that's for sure. I'll give you just one aspect of it that has been on my heart. For me, the mention of the kingdom of heaven in this verse brings to mind another verse where Jesus is talking about the same thing. In Matthew 19, people were bringing their children to Jesus so he could pray for them and bless them. The disciples didn't want to "waste his time" with these kids, so they were shooing them off. But in verse 14, Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."
What a profound and seemingly almost crazy statement! The kingdom belongs to children? What kind of kingdom is that? In the accounts of the same story in Mark and Luke, Jesus goes even further than that: "I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it" (Luke 18:17). Clearly, this is a pretty big deal in Jesus' mind and we would do well to think more about it.
Here's how I see this whole thing relating to being poor in spirit: being poor (in spirit or in body) means you know you need to receive. You don't have what it takes, and you need someone to help you. And who knows how to receive better than little kids? Jesus even points out in that Luke verse that their ability to receive is what we should emulate. Why are they so good at receiving? Partly, I think, because they realize they don't have any other choice.
Think about it: if a little kid is thirsty and wants a glass of water, can they reach the cupboard where the cups are? If they could, then could they reach the faucet to pour it? No, they have to ask for it! Dad, can you get me... etc. For quite a while, small children remain completely dependent on their parents like this. That, to me, is a perfect picture of being poor in spirit.
We can't make God let us into his kingdom or his blessings. We can't get in ourselves by our efforts. We have to ask. In fact, some translators believe that the kids that were being brought to Jesus were actually infants. In that case, we can't even ask... we just have to cry. We have no other choice but to trust that God will know our needs and meet them. It's not so much that we have to lay down our adulthood and be childlike as it is that we need to realize that we are children in God's sight. None of our demands or efforts really changes anything. All we can do is receive the gifts of a good father to his helpless (although sometimes rebellious) children. The kingdom of heaven, for such as these.
What a mystery.
What a blessing.
I think that the teachings of Jesus most emblematic of this concealed style or strategy on his part are the beatitudes. They seem so simple on the surface, even as a group, but each one of them is deep enough to study for a week... or eight... or more! The one I've been thinking about recently, along with many people from the house of prayer, is the first of them, Matthew 5:3. It says, "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."
What does it mean to be poor in spirit? More than I could ever address in a blog entry, that's for sure. I'll give you just one aspect of it that has been on my heart. For me, the mention of the kingdom of heaven in this verse brings to mind another verse where Jesus is talking about the same thing. In Matthew 19, people were bringing their children to Jesus so he could pray for them and bless them. The disciples didn't want to "waste his time" with these kids, so they were shooing them off. But in verse 14, Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."
What a profound and seemingly almost crazy statement! The kingdom belongs to children? What kind of kingdom is that? In the accounts of the same story in Mark and Luke, Jesus goes even further than that: "I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it" (Luke 18:17). Clearly, this is a pretty big deal in Jesus' mind and we would do well to think more about it.
Here's how I see this whole thing relating to being poor in spirit: being poor (in spirit or in body) means you know you need to receive. You don't have what it takes, and you need someone to help you. And who knows how to receive better than little kids? Jesus even points out in that Luke verse that their ability to receive is what we should emulate. Why are they so good at receiving? Partly, I think, because they realize they don't have any other choice.
Think about it: if a little kid is thirsty and wants a glass of water, can they reach the cupboard where the cups are? If they could, then could they reach the faucet to pour it? No, they have to ask for it! Dad, can you get me... etc. For quite a while, small children remain completely dependent on their parents like this. That, to me, is a perfect picture of being poor in spirit.
We can't make God let us into his kingdom or his blessings. We can't get in ourselves by our efforts. We have to ask. In fact, some translators believe that the kids that were being brought to Jesus were actually infants. In that case, we can't even ask... we just have to cry. We have no other choice but to trust that God will know our needs and meet them. It's not so much that we have to lay down our adulthood and be childlike as it is that we need to realize that we are children in God's sight. None of our demands or efforts really changes anything. All we can do is receive the gifts of a good father to his helpless (although sometimes rebellious) children. The kingdom of heaven, for such as these.
What a mystery.
What a blessing.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Whatever you do...
"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." -- Colossians 3:17
This verse has been rocking my world this week. It's so simple, yet so powerful. Simple, in this case, I mean as the opposite of complex, not of difficult. In fact, I think this simple instruction from Paul is something that almost nobody is really good at.
The problem is, we're far too quick to view these kinds of statements in Scripture as suggestions. But this is a command. It's not just an idea for a way to receive blessing and have a better life (although it is that too), it's a sovereign directive from God himself. Obviously, it's a good plan to pay attention to those. So how do we do this thing that God is commanding? Let's take it piece by piece.
First, we have this crucial qualifier, "whatever you do." This is a huge deal, because this phrase makes the coming instruction all-encompassing. Whatever is about to be said, it applies to every single situation and action in our lives, so it should always be on our mind as we make our decisions. These kinds of over-arching statements in Scripture are fairly rare, and they always indicate things that are of great importance. In fact, I can only think of four others in the whole Bible right now (but if you know of any more, please let me know!). One is in Proverbs 4:23: "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." Also, there are the three "one thing" verses, which I'm pretty sure I've previously mentioned on this blog. They are in Psalm 27:4, Luke 10:42, and Philippians 3:13-14. If you don't know them, you should really look them up right now. Also, I can't think of any better place to start memorizing Scripture than these verses.
Next, we have Paul refusing to leave any loopholes in his command. Words and deeds are both included. I know the old saying "actions speak louder than words" has some merit to it, because a lot of times people remember what you do more than what you say. But, trying to make the two things separate is a deceptively false dichotomy. It's not like what you say is unimportant as long as you do the right thing. Words are actions! They are things you choose, and God expects them, like everything else, to be included in his dominion. To reinforce this beyond all doubt, the next words are "do it all." Everything. Pretty self-explanatory, I think.
Now we come to the payoff. We are to do whatever we do "in the name of the Lord Jesus." This part is really the reason I'm getting rocked by this verse. What does it mean to do something (or, as we are instructed, everything) in Jesus' name? Here's my take on it. If you think about it, every action or word gives glory to something. If I brag about my accomplishments, I give glory to myself. Another way to word that would be that I say those boastful things in my own name. If I idolize a celebrity, I give glory to them. I try to be like them, and make decisions essentially in their name. See where I'm going here? Essentially, we are always worshipping something because that's what bringing glory means. If you disagree, try to think of an action that brings no glory to anyone or anything. I couldn't do it.
That's why I'm thinking that doing something in Jesus' name means doing it for his glory. AND, as I just stated, everything brings glory to someone or something. SO, if we aren't bringing glory to Jesus with what we do, we must be bringing glory to someone or something else. There is no middle ground, no neutral gear here. That actually reminds me of another big over-arching statement of the Bible that I forgot earlier. In Matthew 12:30, Jesus says "He who is not with me is against me, and he who does not gather with me scatters." That's what makes this command from Colossians so stunning. There is no moral neutrality. Either words or actions bring glory to God, or they bring glory to something else, and if it's something else then that is against God. Being against God, as you may know, is not a good place to be.
Then to reinforce this point, Paul finishes with the clarification that the things we do should all be out of thanksgiving (see that worship/glory idea again?) to God. This helps us have a better visual picture of what Paul means. It's a good question to ask ourselves as we consider doing something: "can I do this while giving thanks to God?" If the answer is no, we shouldn't do it. End of story.
Here's where this thing gets really sticky for us. As Christians, we want to please God, but we also have our flesh that just wants to please itself. We know it's a bad idea to offend God, so our favorite phrase becomes, "well, it's not wrong..." etc. I'm not going to pull any punches here: that whole idea is a lie from the enemy. If something isn't specifically for God, it's against him. If it doesn't gather glory to God, it scatters that glory elsewhere, and that IS wrong!
Another favorite strategy of ours in justifying our actions is comparison. This one works two different ways. One way is that we have something we want to do, so we look at someone we respect who is doing that: If they're doing it, it must not be wrong! They're a great person! The other way is that we look at someone who is doing something much worse: I'm not doing something that bad, so I should be fine. Both of these approaches have the same problem. The verse doesn't say 'whatever everyone else does,' it says "whatever YOU do"! The decision to glorify God with your life, your words and actions, is up to you individually and no one else. Others might decide differently from us what they think glorifies God, but it shouldn't have any impact on our own decisions. On the flipside of that, we shouldn't judge them either. We should just do what we believe God says is right, no matter what.
So what should we do in light of this all-inclusive command? I can't really tell you what to do because God has to stir it in your heart. As I just mentioned, you shouldn't do anything just because I'm doing it or anyone else is. You need to glorify God in whatever way he shows you. But I'll tell you what I'm doing: I'm looking carefully at my life, thinking and praying about all the things I have and do. If it doesn't glorify Jesus and can't be used to give thanks to God, I'm getting rid of it. When I say getting rid of it, I mean exactly that. In the next week or so, I expect the amount of possessions I have and things I spend my time on to noticeably decrease. I also expect, though, that I won't really miss them if I pursue Jesus instead.
I know that all sounds pretty radical. Jesus was pretty radical too. While we're being radical then, let's just call things what they are. Anything that brings glory to something or someone other than Jesus is an idol. Not just a personal choice, a waste of time, or a harmless little addiction but an idol. And I'm not talking like American Idol, I'm talking like a false god (although I often feel like the two are pretty much synonymous). It's what the first of the Ten Commandments is talking about not having. I just feel like so many of us have the cords of materialism, this world of things we worship, wrapped around us like seaweed dragging us down. What's worse, we don't even know it a lot of the time. I know I didn't. It might be because Christians don't like to use the word idol, which I'm convinced is mostly because it draws attention to their breaking of the first commandment! I know now that I've been breaking this commandment and ignoring it for years. Speaking of people who had seaweed wrapped around them, Jonah said, "those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs" (Jonah 2:8). I don't want to miss out on any more blessings because of stupid things I bow down to! I want to guard my heart and see my life be blessed because of it.
Now, will I get all this right, and keep that command perfectly? I highly doubt it. But I will try. I have to. I'm realizing more and more that if following Jesus isn't a 100% thing, I don't even want to do it. I'm tired of wasting my life. God is calling us to radical holiness, something completely outside what this world's system can offer, something for which there is no model other than Jesus. Holiness. Worshipping one God, being set apart for one purpose only. "Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:13-14, ESV).
Want to come with me?
This verse has been rocking my world this week. It's so simple, yet so powerful. Simple, in this case, I mean as the opposite of complex, not of difficult. In fact, I think this simple instruction from Paul is something that almost nobody is really good at.
The problem is, we're far too quick to view these kinds of statements in Scripture as suggestions. But this is a command. It's not just an idea for a way to receive blessing and have a better life (although it is that too), it's a sovereign directive from God himself. Obviously, it's a good plan to pay attention to those. So how do we do this thing that God is commanding? Let's take it piece by piece.
First, we have this crucial qualifier, "whatever you do." This is a huge deal, because this phrase makes the coming instruction all-encompassing. Whatever is about to be said, it applies to every single situation and action in our lives, so it should always be on our mind as we make our decisions. These kinds of over-arching statements in Scripture are fairly rare, and they always indicate things that are of great importance. In fact, I can only think of four others in the whole Bible right now (but if you know of any more, please let me know!). One is in Proverbs 4:23: "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." Also, there are the three "one thing" verses, which I'm pretty sure I've previously mentioned on this blog. They are in Psalm 27:4, Luke 10:42, and Philippians 3:13-14. If you don't know them, you should really look them up right now. Also, I can't think of any better place to start memorizing Scripture than these verses.
Next, we have Paul refusing to leave any loopholes in his command. Words and deeds are both included. I know the old saying "actions speak louder than words" has some merit to it, because a lot of times people remember what you do more than what you say. But, trying to make the two things separate is a deceptively false dichotomy. It's not like what you say is unimportant as long as you do the right thing. Words are actions! They are things you choose, and God expects them, like everything else, to be included in his dominion. To reinforce this beyond all doubt, the next words are "do it all." Everything. Pretty self-explanatory, I think.
Now we come to the payoff. We are to do whatever we do "in the name of the Lord Jesus." This part is really the reason I'm getting rocked by this verse. What does it mean to do something (or, as we are instructed, everything) in Jesus' name? Here's my take on it. If you think about it, every action or word gives glory to something. If I brag about my accomplishments, I give glory to myself. Another way to word that would be that I say those boastful things in my own name. If I idolize a celebrity, I give glory to them. I try to be like them, and make decisions essentially in their name. See where I'm going here? Essentially, we are always worshipping something because that's what bringing glory means. If you disagree, try to think of an action that brings no glory to anyone or anything. I couldn't do it.
That's why I'm thinking that doing something in Jesus' name means doing it for his glory. AND, as I just stated, everything brings glory to someone or something. SO, if we aren't bringing glory to Jesus with what we do, we must be bringing glory to someone or something else. There is no middle ground, no neutral gear here. That actually reminds me of another big over-arching statement of the Bible that I forgot earlier. In Matthew 12:30, Jesus says "He who is not with me is against me, and he who does not gather with me scatters." That's what makes this command from Colossians so stunning. There is no moral neutrality. Either words or actions bring glory to God, or they bring glory to something else, and if it's something else then that is against God. Being against God, as you may know, is not a good place to be.
Then to reinforce this point, Paul finishes with the clarification that the things we do should all be out of thanksgiving (see that worship/glory idea again?) to God. This helps us have a better visual picture of what Paul means. It's a good question to ask ourselves as we consider doing something: "can I do this while giving thanks to God?" If the answer is no, we shouldn't do it. End of story.
Here's where this thing gets really sticky for us. As Christians, we want to please God, but we also have our flesh that just wants to please itself. We know it's a bad idea to offend God, so our favorite phrase becomes, "well, it's not wrong..." etc. I'm not going to pull any punches here: that whole idea is a lie from the enemy. If something isn't specifically for God, it's against him. If it doesn't gather glory to God, it scatters that glory elsewhere, and that IS wrong!
Another favorite strategy of ours in justifying our actions is comparison. This one works two different ways. One way is that we have something we want to do, so we look at someone we respect who is doing that: If they're doing it, it must not be wrong! They're a great person! The other way is that we look at someone who is doing something much worse: I'm not doing something that bad, so I should be fine. Both of these approaches have the same problem. The verse doesn't say 'whatever everyone else does,' it says "whatever YOU do"! The decision to glorify God with your life, your words and actions, is up to you individually and no one else. Others might decide differently from us what they think glorifies God, but it shouldn't have any impact on our own decisions. On the flipside of that, we shouldn't judge them either. We should just do what we believe God says is right, no matter what.
So what should we do in light of this all-inclusive command? I can't really tell you what to do because God has to stir it in your heart. As I just mentioned, you shouldn't do anything just because I'm doing it or anyone else is. You need to glorify God in whatever way he shows you. But I'll tell you what I'm doing: I'm looking carefully at my life, thinking and praying about all the things I have and do. If it doesn't glorify Jesus and can't be used to give thanks to God, I'm getting rid of it. When I say getting rid of it, I mean exactly that. In the next week or so, I expect the amount of possessions I have and things I spend my time on to noticeably decrease. I also expect, though, that I won't really miss them if I pursue Jesus instead.
I know that all sounds pretty radical. Jesus was pretty radical too. While we're being radical then, let's just call things what they are. Anything that brings glory to something or someone other than Jesus is an idol. Not just a personal choice, a waste of time, or a harmless little addiction but an idol. And I'm not talking like American Idol, I'm talking like a false god (although I often feel like the two are pretty much synonymous). It's what the first of the Ten Commandments is talking about not having. I just feel like so many of us have the cords of materialism, this world of things we worship, wrapped around us like seaweed dragging us down. What's worse, we don't even know it a lot of the time. I know I didn't. It might be because Christians don't like to use the word idol, which I'm convinced is mostly because it draws attention to their breaking of the first commandment! I know now that I've been breaking this commandment and ignoring it for years. Speaking of people who had seaweed wrapped around them, Jonah said, "those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs" (Jonah 2:8). I don't want to miss out on any more blessings because of stupid things I bow down to! I want to guard my heart and see my life be blessed because of it.
Now, will I get all this right, and keep that command perfectly? I highly doubt it. But I will try. I have to. I'm realizing more and more that if following Jesus isn't a 100% thing, I don't even want to do it. I'm tired of wasting my life. God is calling us to radical holiness, something completely outside what this world's system can offer, something for which there is no model other than Jesus. Holiness. Worshipping one God, being set apart for one purpose only. "Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:13-14, ESV).
Want to come with me?
Friday, September 25, 2009
10 reasons I don't have a Facebook
I am becoming more and more aware that I am part of a distinct minority among people of my generation. That's right, I'm a Facebook resister.
As the members of said resistance grow fewer and fewer, though, people seem increasingly quick to mistake my refusal to make myself a Facebook page for a generalized hostility toward the Facebook phenomenon itself (or towards its members). However, I intend no such hostility. In fact, I even have a link here on my blog that lets people share it on Facebook! Many of my friends are devoted Facebookers, and I don't even taunt them (too much) for it!
So just to set the record straight, I thought I would take a brief moment of my day to explain the real reasons why I do not now maintain, nor do I ever expect in the future to possess, a Facebook. Note that this is not necessarily an exhaustive list, but it should cover most of the important issues as I see them. I also don't claim any of this as fact, just my own opinion. If you think I'm wrong, let me know! I'd be really happy if all this did was spur thought and discussion on the issue. So, I'll count down the top ten reasons I don't have Facebook, from least important to most important. Here we go:
10. My mom has a Facebook. Mom, if you're reading this, I love you and I mean no offense by it. It's just that your membership is a.) the reason I know so much about Facebook without actually having one, and b.) a great example of a larger trend I'm getting at. Namely, I feel that Facebook has become something my generation never intended it to be. Originally, it was just a cool way to keep in touch and share pictures (which are, by the way, the only things I'd use Facebook for if I had one and are undeniably useful and beneficial) among college students and other young adults. Then high-schoolers started joining. Then parents came to check on them. All of a sudden, they were also commenting on pictures and writing cheesy status messages. Before anyone could say "1950's," it seemed like the whole baby boomer generation had Facebook. End result: Facebook just isn't as cool anymore, and has much less of a draw for me.
9. Little kids have Facebook. Like, really little. This is kind of a corollary to #10, and it's disturbing for all of the same reasons, with the added twist that a lot of things happen on Facebook that really are not appropriate for little kids to be hearing and thinking about. Now, I don't think I'd have anything to hide, but I have some friends with significantly different standards of morality than my own and I'd hate to have to shelter kids that might look at my page from them. I love hanging out with little kids, but they certainly aren't my friends in the same way. Why do they have to grow up so fast?
8. I have no real desire for up-to-the-minute status updates on my friends. In fact, this whole thing kind of freaks me out. Except for my very closest friends (who I talk to plenty without Facebook's intervention), I'm not even interested in what people are doing or feeling moment by moment. Even for my close friends, there are still many things I don't need to know. That might sound horribly mercenary, but if you really think about it, I imagine the same is true for you. Sure, taking in a lot of banal information about what people are doing might make you feel like you care about them, but in essence it's just voyeurism.
7. I have even less desire to give constant status updates on myself. If you know me well at all, you probably realize that I usually play things pretty close to the vest and often prefer to keep my opinions and plans to myself. Now, this has been a problem for me in some ways, since I haven't always let people in to what the real me is like. I'm working on it. The thing is, Facebook is a really bad solution to that problem, because trivial status updates are in no way the same thing as being truly real with people. I suppose status updates could be used for good purposes (for example, my pastor has Facebook, and some of his that I've seen are challenging and personal), but this is certainly the exception rather than the rule and I doubt I'd be any better. In any case, I'd rather apply my efforts to real life, or to this blog. I like talking about big issues and hard topics, and I don't hear very much about that happening on Facebook, whereas my blog already provides me with a great space for this kind of thought. Also, I feel like most anything really true or profound on Facebook is just quickly drowned in the sea of immaturity. That's why I chose to keep my blog separate in the first place.
6. I can get all the real benefits of Facebook without having one. For example, because all my friends have one, if any of them post anything truly remarkable or abnormally hilarious, one of the others is sure to tell me about it. Alternatively, because my mom is Facebook friends with most of my actual friends, she also keeps me updated and lets me use her account to look at their pictures sometimes. That wouldn't even be necessary though, since Facebook members are still able to email me the link to their albums, which I can then look at if their privacy settings aren't on some very restricted level. Also, I can use email to get in touch with all my friends at once if I so desire. This works because Facebook users often like checking their email to see how many "notifications" they have. It makes them feel important. And finally, if I feel the need to express myself or have a personal profile page, this blog can serve that purpose quite ably. So in psychological terms, I guess you couldn't say I have a "felt need" for Facebook.
5. Farmville. This one should really be pretty self-explanatory, but I can't resist moving past it without saying this: Farmville is a pestilence in the land. Whoever unleashed this monstrosity should be tied down and forced to listen to its theme music until he repents and erases it from the world of Facebook. It shouldn't take that long; the whole "song" is basically a 4-measure loop of horribly twangy sounds that could pretty much reduce anyone to insanity in a matter of hours. (Can you tell that a certain unnamed but aforementioned family member of mine enjoys this game?) On a more serious note, this particular app is also pretty exemplary of the general trend of immensely time-wasting applications on Facebook. This just seems to me to be the most obviously pointless example, but actually the combined force of all these apps produces a powerful life-consuming time vortex in a lot of people's lives (see my post on video games for more on this). I feel like Facebook would prove to be an unnecessary temptation for me in this regard.
4. People accept Facebook without thought. One of the most disturbing things about Facebook to me is that no one seems to question anymore that this is what social interaction in the 21st century should be like. It bothers me that no one is really thinking about what Facebook really is and whether or not they want one. Most people who sign up for it are just blindly following the trend because they crave friendship and interaction, and being heavily marketed to and media-saturated all the while. I'm not abstaining from Facebook just to be somehow cool by breaking the trend and not doing what everyone else is doing. I've thought about what it is and decided that I don't want it. I've been recognizing lately my need for real friendship, and I don't think I can meet that need on Facebook. Now, I doubt anyone else would say they could either, but they might be unaware of how the shallow interactions they constantly engage in are muffling their true desire for deep relationship, truly knowing and being known. Just something to think about.
3. I'm scared I'd get addicted to it. I realize, of course, that it is quite possible to have a Facebook and not be addicted to it. However, I've heard far too many stories of people who hate how much time they've spent on it and wish they had never started. I've also heard many more stories about people who don't even realize how addicted they are to it and how much power it has in their life, which is even scarier. In any case, I feel like I have much better things to do with my time. That's why for me personally, Facebook is scary because I tend to be a little bit obsessive about having things perfect and organized and also about collecting things. I don't feel like I could ever be satisfied with Facebook if I hadn't collected every single person I know as a "friend." I'd want all my settings and profile perfectly in order, and I'd probably want to be the best at all the games too. Again, video games and I have a storied history that I never want to go back to. So all in all, I feel like I could end up wasting enormous amounts of time and really forgetting about letting God make all my decisions (which is my goal), and I don't even want to open the door for that to happen.
2. It's too late. I've been a Facebook resister and a fairly vocal critic of it for so long now that I can never get one. I don't think I'd ever be able to live it down, and I'd feel really stupid for saying all those things and then getting one anyway. I think it's safe to say I've passed the point of no return on this one. I'm in this for the long haul :)
1. I don't want "Facebook friends." Honestly, this is my biggest beef with Facebook. I really feel like it promotes shallowness and superficiality as the solution to the much deeper problems of our generation. We don't need status updates, we don't need to know what Disney character we are most like, and we don't need to express our true personality through our "pieces of flair" (although some of them are legitimately hilarious, and joking around online is great fun). What we need is real friendship with real people. How else are we expecting to "spur one another on towards love and good deeds" (Hebrews 10:24) or help heal our broken city? To do those things, we're going to have to get face-to-face and side-by-side and be much realer with each other than computer screens allow. (And yes, bloggers need to watch out for superficiality too :) I'm trying my best to practice what I preach and use my blog mainly as a tool for sparking real-life discussion and interaction with my friends.)
Now, obviously we can't have deep, hugely significant relationships with all the people we cross paths with. Even Jesus had different circles of friends: the multitudes followed him, but he placed special importance on the 72 he sent out, and the 12 disciples were his inner circle. Even within that, Peter, James and John were his three really close friends. So, Facebook or not, I think that's the example we should try to emulate. You know what? It's ok to have shallower, "Facebook friend" relationships. We just need to know where our real friends are, and we need to be real and really present (physically and emotionally) in their lives, even though that's hard. You know what else? It's also ok to have less friends. I just feel like the effort to fill the "friends list" causes too many people to have a set of "friendships" a mile wide and an inch deep. That will never satisfy a generation, a city, a nation looking for real love. We need real brothers and sisters and parents, real friends. "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24). Can we learn to be that friend?
As the members of said resistance grow fewer and fewer, though, people seem increasingly quick to mistake my refusal to make myself a Facebook page for a generalized hostility toward the Facebook phenomenon itself (or towards its members). However, I intend no such hostility. In fact, I even have a link here on my blog that lets people share it on Facebook! Many of my friends are devoted Facebookers, and I don't even taunt them (too much) for it!
So just to set the record straight, I thought I would take a brief moment of my day to explain the real reasons why I do not now maintain, nor do I ever expect in the future to possess, a Facebook. Note that this is not necessarily an exhaustive list, but it should cover most of the important issues as I see them. I also don't claim any of this as fact, just my own opinion. If you think I'm wrong, let me know! I'd be really happy if all this did was spur thought and discussion on the issue. So, I'll count down the top ten reasons I don't have Facebook, from least important to most important. Here we go:
10. My mom has a Facebook. Mom, if you're reading this, I love you and I mean no offense by it. It's just that your membership is a.) the reason I know so much about Facebook without actually having one, and b.) a great example of a larger trend I'm getting at. Namely, I feel that Facebook has become something my generation never intended it to be. Originally, it was just a cool way to keep in touch and share pictures (which are, by the way, the only things I'd use Facebook for if I had one and are undeniably useful and beneficial) among college students and other young adults. Then high-schoolers started joining. Then parents came to check on them. All of a sudden, they were also commenting on pictures and writing cheesy status messages. Before anyone could say "1950's," it seemed like the whole baby boomer generation had Facebook. End result: Facebook just isn't as cool anymore, and has much less of a draw for me.
9. Little kids have Facebook. Like, really little. This is kind of a corollary to #10, and it's disturbing for all of the same reasons, with the added twist that a lot of things happen on Facebook that really are not appropriate for little kids to be hearing and thinking about. Now, I don't think I'd have anything to hide, but I have some friends with significantly different standards of morality than my own and I'd hate to have to shelter kids that might look at my page from them. I love hanging out with little kids, but they certainly aren't my friends in the same way. Why do they have to grow up so fast?
8. I have no real desire for up-to-the-minute status updates on my friends. In fact, this whole thing kind of freaks me out. Except for my very closest friends (who I talk to plenty without Facebook's intervention), I'm not even interested in what people are doing or feeling moment by moment. Even for my close friends, there are still many things I don't need to know. That might sound horribly mercenary, but if you really think about it, I imagine the same is true for you. Sure, taking in a lot of banal information about what people are doing might make you feel like you care about them, but in essence it's just voyeurism.
7. I have even less desire to give constant status updates on myself. If you know me well at all, you probably realize that I usually play things pretty close to the vest and often prefer to keep my opinions and plans to myself. Now, this has been a problem for me in some ways, since I haven't always let people in to what the real me is like. I'm working on it. The thing is, Facebook is a really bad solution to that problem, because trivial status updates are in no way the same thing as being truly real with people. I suppose status updates could be used for good purposes (for example, my pastor has Facebook, and some of his that I've seen are challenging and personal), but this is certainly the exception rather than the rule and I doubt I'd be any better. In any case, I'd rather apply my efforts to real life, or to this blog. I like talking about big issues and hard topics, and I don't hear very much about that happening on Facebook, whereas my blog already provides me with a great space for this kind of thought. Also, I feel like most anything really true or profound on Facebook is just quickly drowned in the sea of immaturity. That's why I chose to keep my blog separate in the first place.
6. I can get all the real benefits of Facebook without having one. For example, because all my friends have one, if any of them post anything truly remarkable or abnormally hilarious, one of the others is sure to tell me about it. Alternatively, because my mom is Facebook friends with most of my actual friends, she also keeps me updated and lets me use her account to look at their pictures sometimes. That wouldn't even be necessary though, since Facebook members are still able to email me the link to their albums, which I can then look at if their privacy settings aren't on some very restricted level. Also, I can use email to get in touch with all my friends at once if I so desire. This works because Facebook users often like checking their email to see how many "notifications" they have. It makes them feel important. And finally, if I feel the need to express myself or have a personal profile page, this blog can serve that purpose quite ably. So in psychological terms, I guess you couldn't say I have a "felt need" for Facebook.
5. Farmville. This one should really be pretty self-explanatory, but I can't resist moving past it without saying this: Farmville is a pestilence in the land. Whoever unleashed this monstrosity should be tied down and forced to listen to its theme music until he repents and erases it from the world of Facebook. It shouldn't take that long; the whole "song" is basically a 4-measure loop of horribly twangy sounds that could pretty much reduce anyone to insanity in a matter of hours. (Can you tell that a certain unnamed but aforementioned family member of mine enjoys this game?) On a more serious note, this particular app is also pretty exemplary of the general trend of immensely time-wasting applications on Facebook. This just seems to me to be the most obviously pointless example, but actually the combined force of all these apps produces a powerful life-consuming time vortex in a lot of people's lives (see my post on video games for more on this). I feel like Facebook would prove to be an unnecessary temptation for me in this regard.
4. People accept Facebook without thought. One of the most disturbing things about Facebook to me is that no one seems to question anymore that this is what social interaction in the 21st century should be like. It bothers me that no one is really thinking about what Facebook really is and whether or not they want one. Most people who sign up for it are just blindly following the trend because they crave friendship and interaction, and being heavily marketed to and media-saturated all the while. I'm not abstaining from Facebook just to be somehow cool by breaking the trend and not doing what everyone else is doing. I've thought about what it is and decided that I don't want it. I've been recognizing lately my need for real friendship, and I don't think I can meet that need on Facebook. Now, I doubt anyone else would say they could either, but they might be unaware of how the shallow interactions they constantly engage in are muffling their true desire for deep relationship, truly knowing and being known. Just something to think about.
3. I'm scared I'd get addicted to it. I realize, of course, that it is quite possible to have a Facebook and not be addicted to it. However, I've heard far too many stories of people who hate how much time they've spent on it and wish they had never started. I've also heard many more stories about people who don't even realize how addicted they are to it and how much power it has in their life, which is even scarier. In any case, I feel like I have much better things to do with my time. That's why for me personally, Facebook is scary because I tend to be a little bit obsessive about having things perfect and organized and also about collecting things. I don't feel like I could ever be satisfied with Facebook if I hadn't collected every single person I know as a "friend." I'd want all my settings and profile perfectly in order, and I'd probably want to be the best at all the games too. Again, video games and I have a storied history that I never want to go back to. So all in all, I feel like I could end up wasting enormous amounts of time and really forgetting about letting God make all my decisions (which is my goal), and I don't even want to open the door for that to happen.
2. It's too late. I've been a Facebook resister and a fairly vocal critic of it for so long now that I can never get one. I don't think I'd ever be able to live it down, and I'd feel really stupid for saying all those things and then getting one anyway. I think it's safe to say I've passed the point of no return on this one. I'm in this for the long haul :)
1. I don't want "Facebook friends." Honestly, this is my biggest beef with Facebook. I really feel like it promotes shallowness and superficiality as the solution to the much deeper problems of our generation. We don't need status updates, we don't need to know what Disney character we are most like, and we don't need to express our true personality through our "pieces of flair" (although some of them are legitimately hilarious, and joking around online is great fun). What we need is real friendship with real people. How else are we expecting to "spur one another on towards love and good deeds" (Hebrews 10:24) or help heal our broken city? To do those things, we're going to have to get face-to-face and side-by-side and be much realer with each other than computer screens allow. (And yes, bloggers need to watch out for superficiality too :) I'm trying my best to practice what I preach and use my blog mainly as a tool for sparking real-life discussion and interaction with my friends.)
Now, obviously we can't have deep, hugely significant relationships with all the people we cross paths with. Even Jesus had different circles of friends: the multitudes followed him, but he placed special importance on the 72 he sent out, and the 12 disciples were his inner circle. Even within that, Peter, James and John were his three really close friends. So, Facebook or not, I think that's the example we should try to emulate. You know what? It's ok to have shallower, "Facebook friend" relationships. We just need to know where our real friends are, and we need to be real and really present (physically and emotionally) in their lives, even though that's hard. You know what else? It's also ok to have less friends. I just feel like the effort to fill the "friends list" causes too many people to have a set of "friendships" a mile wide and an inch deep. That will never satisfy a generation, a city, a nation looking for real love. We need real brothers and sisters and parents, real friends. "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24). Can we learn to be that friend?
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Inside Out
I'll start today's entry with a poem. It's the most recent one I've written, not old stuff like what I've posted so far. In fact, no one has ever read this poem before whichever one of you gets here first! It's the first one of its kind, a streetlights premiere. Here it is:
Inside Out
isolation underneath impressive
unknown against accomplishment
doing always more being less
hiding in the center of circles
victories full of sound alone
another world in control
politeness over perversion
impeccable outside filthy
confusion masquerading completion
pride intertwining pain
admiration in place
of love impossible
because artificial
because unknown
Don’t let me miss you.
So, this is a highly personal poem, but I share it because I think that it doesn't apply only to me. There are some lessons in it that I'd love to spare anyone else the pain of having to learn the way I did. I guess it's specifically about my ongoing journey of figuring out who I am and learning to actually be that person. I'll give a little bit of my own backstory as well as some insight into my strange poetic method in order to hopefully explain this little poem.
In terms of poetic style, this one is really kind of a personal anomaly. As most of you already know, I'm a big fan of complete sentences and good grammar, sometimes to the point of being a bit anal about it. So here we have this poem that completely resists both punctuation and normal syntax until its very last line. Guess which line of the poem I wrote first and which one is the most important to understanding the whole poem...
I made all those unusual (for me) stylistic choices for a reason though. The best way I can describe what I'm going for in this poem requires a visual aid. Unfortunately, this is the internet, so you'll have to make your own since I can't really show you. Don't worry though, it's very simple and I'll walk you through it. Ok, so to see what this poem is like, you need a sock. Any kind of sock, it doesn't matter, but it does need to be one you aren't currently wearing. I'll wait while you go get one.
...
Ready? Alright, hold the sock in front of you, so you can look straight down into the hole. That top circle of the sock is like the last line of my poem. So, grab the sock by that with one hand, and with the other push the rest of the sock up from underneath so it ends up inside out (get it?) and upside down. Notice, that hole is still in the same place, but now you can see a lot more of what used to be inside it. It's also much less pretty than the outside of the sock, and more disorderly. All that crazy fuzzy stuff you can now see, along with any accompanying dirt, sand, toenail fragments, etc., represents the rest of my poem. Wasn't that fun?
Anyway, the idea I'm going for is that in a good poem, each line that actually appears (e.g. Don't let me miss you) should have all kinds of stored up meaning underneath the surface. This poem takes that one particular cry of my heart and turns it inside out so you can see the mesh and mess that it actually consists of. I've written other poems sort of like this before, now that I think about it, with endings that encourage reinterpretation of the whole rest of the poem in their light. Maybe I can start a new genre! "Sock poems"...
On the more serious side, though, I think the underlying issue of this poem is one that everyone can identify with. All of us want so badly to be loved, and we will really do just about anything to make that happen. The problem is, who we are is not what we do. I've spent (read: wasted) so much time in my life trying to conform my image to what I thought people wanted me to be. I specifically remember in middle school looking at the "cool kids" who picked on me and my friends and analyzing what made them cool. "Oh, so cool kids wear this and act like this... I can do that!" And you know what the scary and really sad thing is? To a pretty great extent, I did.
Now, I had determined beforehand that I would use the coolness I would obtain to be nice to people those other kids would be mean to. I did end up being able to do that in some ways, but I also became in other ways just as judgmental as those people I hated. I knew all along that I was worth more than they were giving me credit for, but unfortunately I solved that problem by trying to attain what was valuable in their eyes, not by realizing their standard was twisted. So while I did eventually largely escape their judgment, I did so by buying into their bankrupt standards of coolness.
To make a long story very short, the result of my quest to remake my image was, on the surface, successful. People started to think I was cool, girls started to pay attention to me, and I was loving it. I used my sense of humor to make myself the center of attention and used my accomplishments and skills in an attempt to force people to respect me. Below the surface, though, something very different was going on. I was in the process of actively forgetting who I was.
I started getting more and more stressed out, and that led into deeper problems like depression. See, constantly managing what everyone is thinking about you is a heck of a lot of work, and it was burning me out while I was unaware. I was thinking about every single action and decision based on what it would do to the image I was portraying to everyone. In the process, I was losing touch with what I actually wanted. I became all the ugly things in my poem while looking like I was all their exact opposites. Worst of all, I wanted love, but all I got was admiration. But how could anyone have actually loved me? They didn't know who I really was! Many admired my fake front or thought it was cool and had things together, but who was underneath? I was largely unaware myself, so how could they know?
Thankfully, God still knew what was underneath. He let me get to the desperate end of my remaking of myself in my own image, and then he came at that front with a sledgehammer. He used people that knew me before my front and some that he just supernaturally told about my issues to challenge me about who I really was. I felt like huge chunks of me were falling off as what was inside was painfully brought out. He showed me through a series of very painful circumstances how broken I was (am) and gave me no other choice but to admit it.
Then the strangest things started to happen. I had thought that God (and everyone else) would reject me if they saw the brokenness I was hiding. But as I became more honest about who I was and began to take off my many masks, I felt God's love more and more. And, people started being able to actually care for me, and for some reason, they wanted to do so! There's really no other word for it but grace.
Here's the thing: if God created us, then it stands to reason that only he knows what we are really made for. Only the maker would. So I think the only way we can ever hope to love anyone else or be loved ourselves is to know God. If we know him, he can tell us who we actually are and give us strength to walk in it. This enables us to love others and be truly loved for who we are in return. It's change from the inside out.
For me, I tried to change my outside to find love, and all it brought was destruction inside. Don't waste your time with that! Jesus wants to move on the inside and let the change flow out in "streams of living water" (John 7:38). Recently a friend of mine reminded me of the prayer of St. Francis. This prayer talks about that kind of inside out change and reminds me a great deal of the streetlights' call, so I'll finish with it (slightly amended with a prayer of my own that should be quite obvious):
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
God, O God, don't let me miss you.
Amen.
Inside Out
isolation underneath impressive
unknown against accomplishment
doing always more being less
hiding in the center of circles
victories full of sound alone
another world in control
politeness over perversion
impeccable outside filthy
confusion masquerading completion
pride intertwining pain
admiration in place
of love impossible
because artificial
because unknown
Don’t let me miss you.
So, this is a highly personal poem, but I share it because I think that it doesn't apply only to me. There are some lessons in it that I'd love to spare anyone else the pain of having to learn the way I did. I guess it's specifically about my ongoing journey of figuring out who I am and learning to actually be that person. I'll give a little bit of my own backstory as well as some insight into my strange poetic method in order to hopefully explain this little poem.
In terms of poetic style, this one is really kind of a personal anomaly. As most of you already know, I'm a big fan of complete sentences and good grammar, sometimes to the point of being a bit anal about it. So here we have this poem that completely resists both punctuation and normal syntax until its very last line. Guess which line of the poem I wrote first and which one is the most important to understanding the whole poem...
I made all those unusual (for me) stylistic choices for a reason though. The best way I can describe what I'm going for in this poem requires a visual aid. Unfortunately, this is the internet, so you'll have to make your own since I can't really show you. Don't worry though, it's very simple and I'll walk you through it. Ok, so to see what this poem is like, you need a sock. Any kind of sock, it doesn't matter, but it does need to be one you aren't currently wearing. I'll wait while you go get one.
...
Ready? Alright, hold the sock in front of you, so you can look straight down into the hole. That top circle of the sock is like the last line of my poem. So, grab the sock by that with one hand, and with the other push the rest of the sock up from underneath so it ends up inside out (get it?) and upside down. Notice, that hole is still in the same place, but now you can see a lot more of what used to be inside it. It's also much less pretty than the outside of the sock, and more disorderly. All that crazy fuzzy stuff you can now see, along with any accompanying dirt, sand, toenail fragments, etc., represents the rest of my poem. Wasn't that fun?
Anyway, the idea I'm going for is that in a good poem, each line that actually appears (e.g. Don't let me miss you) should have all kinds of stored up meaning underneath the surface. This poem takes that one particular cry of my heart and turns it inside out so you can see the mesh and mess that it actually consists of. I've written other poems sort of like this before, now that I think about it, with endings that encourage reinterpretation of the whole rest of the poem in their light. Maybe I can start a new genre! "Sock poems"...
On the more serious side, though, I think the underlying issue of this poem is one that everyone can identify with. All of us want so badly to be loved, and we will really do just about anything to make that happen. The problem is, who we are is not what we do. I've spent (read: wasted) so much time in my life trying to conform my image to what I thought people wanted me to be. I specifically remember in middle school looking at the "cool kids" who picked on me and my friends and analyzing what made them cool. "Oh, so cool kids wear this and act like this... I can do that!" And you know what the scary and really sad thing is? To a pretty great extent, I did.
Now, I had determined beforehand that I would use the coolness I would obtain to be nice to people those other kids would be mean to. I did end up being able to do that in some ways, but I also became in other ways just as judgmental as those people I hated. I knew all along that I was worth more than they were giving me credit for, but unfortunately I solved that problem by trying to attain what was valuable in their eyes, not by realizing their standard was twisted. So while I did eventually largely escape their judgment, I did so by buying into their bankrupt standards of coolness.
To make a long story very short, the result of my quest to remake my image was, on the surface, successful. People started to think I was cool, girls started to pay attention to me, and I was loving it. I used my sense of humor to make myself the center of attention and used my accomplishments and skills in an attempt to force people to respect me. Below the surface, though, something very different was going on. I was in the process of actively forgetting who I was.
I started getting more and more stressed out, and that led into deeper problems like depression. See, constantly managing what everyone is thinking about you is a heck of a lot of work, and it was burning me out while I was unaware. I was thinking about every single action and decision based on what it would do to the image I was portraying to everyone. In the process, I was losing touch with what I actually wanted. I became all the ugly things in my poem while looking like I was all their exact opposites. Worst of all, I wanted love, but all I got was admiration. But how could anyone have actually loved me? They didn't know who I really was! Many admired my fake front or thought it was cool and had things together, but who was underneath? I was largely unaware myself, so how could they know?
Thankfully, God still knew what was underneath. He let me get to the desperate end of my remaking of myself in my own image, and then he came at that front with a sledgehammer. He used people that knew me before my front and some that he just supernaturally told about my issues to challenge me about who I really was. I felt like huge chunks of me were falling off as what was inside was painfully brought out. He showed me through a series of very painful circumstances how broken I was (am) and gave me no other choice but to admit it.
Then the strangest things started to happen. I had thought that God (and everyone else) would reject me if they saw the brokenness I was hiding. But as I became more honest about who I was and began to take off my many masks, I felt God's love more and more. And, people started being able to actually care for me, and for some reason, they wanted to do so! There's really no other word for it but grace.
Here's the thing: if God created us, then it stands to reason that only he knows what we are really made for. Only the maker would. So I think the only way we can ever hope to love anyone else or be loved ourselves is to know God. If we know him, he can tell us who we actually are and give us strength to walk in it. This enables us to love others and be truly loved for who we are in return. It's change from the inside out.
For me, I tried to change my outside to find love, and all it brought was destruction inside. Don't waste your time with that! Jesus wants to move on the inside and let the change flow out in "streams of living water" (John 7:38). Recently a friend of mine reminded me of the prayer of St. Francis. This prayer talks about that kind of inside out change and reminds me a great deal of the streetlights' call, so I'll finish with it (slightly amended with a prayer of my own that should be quite obvious):
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
God, O God, don't let me miss you.
Amen.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Audience
"Know your audience." It's one of the first things all aspiring writers are taught, but sometimes a rather tricky thing to do. When it comes to blogging, for example, how can you really know who you're talking to exactly? I assume that most (if not all) of the people reading this right now are my friends in real life, but I have no way of knowing which ones. And honestly, that makes it a little difficult to know what kind of tone to take as I talk about serious things that I really care about. I don't relate to all people the same way (although maybe I should).
So, I don't really know my audience for sure. I guess that just means I have to focus on posting things that can be beneficial to whoever might read them. I realize that not everything here will be a blessing to everyone, but that's ok with me. As I think about it, this blog really has several different purposes, each of which have to do with different potential audiences.
For example, sometimes when I write here it feels like I'm just shooting words out into the clear blue sky, never to be seen or heard from again. There is, in fact, the very real possibility that no one will read some of the things I post. Even if that were true, though, I'd still write here. One huge purpose of this blog, I'm finding, is that it helps me clarify my thoughts on some of the issues that will define my life-- things like how much I'll let God have control of my life, or how Cleveland can be changed. As I write, I'm forced to think about what is important enough to include, and it helps me realize key things that I often haven't even begun to think about when I start an entry. I'm also forming an archive of my thoughts that I can look back on and learn from later (it's my most successful attempt at journaling so far). I'm becoming a better writer too, since writing (like most other things) is something you can only really get better at by doing it. I wouldn't trade all those things for all the readers in the world.
Hypothetical scenarios aside, I do know that I have at least a few readers. For my friends and family, this blog is becoming a way that I can share my story with you. In the past, I realize I've been pretty bad at doing that, for which I hope all of you can forgive me. I hope also that what I write here can provide opportunities for face-to-face conversations about the things that really matter. Just as a disclaimer, when I write about what God is doing in my life here, please don't assume that I have this stuff figured out. I love to discuss and chop it up both one-on-one and in groups to gain the wisdom and perspective of the people I trust. In fact, as God is showing me more of who I actually am, I realize how much I've depended on my family, both natural and spiritual, all along. So if you're interested for whatever reason in sharing my journey, please come with me.
For anyone I don't know yet who (I hope) is reading this, I hope it blesses you. Whether or not you share my religious convictions that shape and influence this whole process, I hope you see authenticity and integrity in what I write. I don't have all the answers, but I can't imagine not looking for them. If you're looking, consider me your fellow searcher. I hope my words are encouraging, even if sometimes challenging. They challenge me. I'm sure you feel the darkness of life into which I do my best to bring a small light, and I hope you'll accept my invitation to do the same.
And for everyone, if you read this and like it, take time to say hi! Leave a comment after a post you like (or don't like). Challenge my thoughts and ideas (but feel free to agree with me as well)! Or, if you don't want to leave your thoughts in public for anyone to see, I love getting email too. Chances are you got this link from an email from me (it's in the signature line of every one I send), but if not, you can always get my address from my profile.
If you really like the blog, follow it! There are buttons that say "follow" in the very top navbar and in the right sidebar near the bottom. Or if you prefer to keep tabs on things using feeds, there's a link to subscribe to this site at the bottom of the page and in the sidebar as well. Either of those methods will make it so you don't have to guess when I've posted a new entry, which is a fairly impossible guessing game to play.
Just for those of you who like the guessing game though, I have added some features to the blog that you can look at even when I don't update it. The "poem of the day," as mentioned previously, randomly posts a great poem from the Library of Congress each day. I've also added a "word of the day" because I really like words, as I'm sure you all know by now. Increasing your vocabulary is fun! Yeah, I'm definitely an English major. Anyway, even more exciting, down at the bottom of the posts section (because it was too wide for the sidebar), there is now also a Calvin & Hobbes comic strip of the day! As you may or may not know, C&H is without question the finest comic strip ever to have existed, a topic on which I'm sure I'll write more later. If I were you, I'd come to my blog every day just for that.
Finally, to end my spiel of shameless self-advertisement, I now have in place a gadget in the right sidebar (and a button in the top bar) that will let you share my blog on your facebook or twitter. I don't have a facebook or twitter account and I'm not really a fan of either (another topic for a future post), but I'm not above using those resources to increase my blog traffic :) If you think what I'm writing would be interesting or important enough to share with your friends on your profile, please do. I think this stuff is important, or at least amusing, or I wouldn't be writing it. Any help you offer would be greatly appreciated.
So, that's it for now, my first effort towards both knowing and expanding my audience. By the way, this is post #10 on this blog, which makes it legit, not just a passing fancy (according to the highly scientific standard I just developed ten seconds ago). I feel like I've done all the cosmetic changes and content tweaks that I'll need for awhile, and I plan to keep writing here for a long time to come. Thanks for reading!
So, I don't really know my audience for sure. I guess that just means I have to focus on posting things that can be beneficial to whoever might read them. I realize that not everything here will be a blessing to everyone, but that's ok with me. As I think about it, this blog really has several different purposes, each of which have to do with different potential audiences.
For example, sometimes when I write here it feels like I'm just shooting words out into the clear blue sky, never to be seen or heard from again. There is, in fact, the very real possibility that no one will read some of the things I post. Even if that were true, though, I'd still write here. One huge purpose of this blog, I'm finding, is that it helps me clarify my thoughts on some of the issues that will define my life-- things like how much I'll let God have control of my life, or how Cleveland can be changed. As I write, I'm forced to think about what is important enough to include, and it helps me realize key things that I often haven't even begun to think about when I start an entry. I'm also forming an archive of my thoughts that I can look back on and learn from later (it's my most successful attempt at journaling so far). I'm becoming a better writer too, since writing (like most other things) is something you can only really get better at by doing it. I wouldn't trade all those things for all the readers in the world.
Hypothetical scenarios aside, I do know that I have at least a few readers. For my friends and family, this blog is becoming a way that I can share my story with you. In the past, I realize I've been pretty bad at doing that, for which I hope all of you can forgive me. I hope also that what I write here can provide opportunities for face-to-face conversations about the things that really matter. Just as a disclaimer, when I write about what God is doing in my life here, please don't assume that I have this stuff figured out. I love to discuss and chop it up both one-on-one and in groups to gain the wisdom and perspective of the people I trust. In fact, as God is showing me more of who I actually am, I realize how much I've depended on my family, both natural and spiritual, all along. So if you're interested for whatever reason in sharing my journey, please come with me.
For anyone I don't know yet who (I hope) is reading this, I hope it blesses you. Whether or not you share my religious convictions that shape and influence this whole process, I hope you see authenticity and integrity in what I write. I don't have all the answers, but I can't imagine not looking for them. If you're looking, consider me your fellow searcher. I hope my words are encouraging, even if sometimes challenging. They challenge me. I'm sure you feel the darkness of life into which I do my best to bring a small light, and I hope you'll accept my invitation to do the same.
And for everyone, if you read this and like it, take time to say hi! Leave a comment after a post you like (or don't like). Challenge my thoughts and ideas (but feel free to agree with me as well)! Or, if you don't want to leave your thoughts in public for anyone to see, I love getting email too. Chances are you got this link from an email from me (it's in the signature line of every one I send), but if not, you can always get my address from my profile.
If you really like the blog, follow it! There are buttons that say "follow" in the very top navbar and in the right sidebar near the bottom. Or if you prefer to keep tabs on things using feeds, there's a link to subscribe to this site at the bottom of the page and in the sidebar as well. Either of those methods will make it so you don't have to guess when I've posted a new entry, which is a fairly impossible guessing game to play.
Just for those of you who like the guessing game though, I have added some features to the blog that you can look at even when I don't update it. The "poem of the day," as mentioned previously, randomly posts a great poem from the Library of Congress each day. I've also added a "word of the day" because I really like words, as I'm sure you all know by now. Increasing your vocabulary is fun! Yeah, I'm definitely an English major. Anyway, even more exciting, down at the bottom of the posts section (because it was too wide for the sidebar), there is now also a Calvin & Hobbes comic strip of the day! As you may or may not know, C&H is without question the finest comic strip ever to have existed, a topic on which I'm sure I'll write more later. If I were you, I'd come to my blog every day just for that.
Finally, to end my spiel of shameless self-advertisement, I now have in place a gadget in the right sidebar (and a button in the top bar) that will let you share my blog on your facebook or twitter. I don't have a facebook or twitter account and I'm not really a fan of either (another topic for a future post), but I'm not above using those resources to increase my blog traffic :) If you think what I'm writing would be interesting or important enough to share with your friends on your profile, please do. I think this stuff is important, or at least amusing, or I wouldn't be writing it. Any help you offer would be greatly appreciated.
So, that's it for now, my first effort towards both knowing and expanding my audience. By the way, this is post #10 on this blog, which makes it legit, not just a passing fancy (according to the highly scientific standard I just developed ten seconds ago). I feel like I've done all the cosmetic changes and content tweaks that I'll need for awhile, and I plan to keep writing here for a long time to come. Thanks for reading!
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Your Kingdom come...
Anyone who has ever been even remotely associated with Christians or Christianity will certainly recognize the phrase serving as the title for this entry. In fact, many Christians have probably said those words countless times without really thinking about them, until finally the words are completely stripped of meaning. (As a side note, constant repetition of pretty much any word or words will eventually make you wonder what things mean. It works especially well, I find, with multi-syllable words. For example, just try saying something like "telephone" or "salami" over and over and over. Eventually, you'll be like, "who thought of this word?" and then "what does this word even mean?" until it finally ends up with something like "who am I?"...) Anyway, strange forms of amusement invented by only children aside, I think there's real danger in saying some things without caring about their meaning. Specifically, I'm talking about things with real spiritual significance, e.g. the Lord's prayer.
What are we really saying when we say "your kingdom come" ? Well, first of all, God's kingdom when fully revealed will be the place of ultimate peace. There won't be any more war, or death, or hurt or crying or anything like that. Sickness will be a thing of the past, as will poverty, racism and any other forces you can think of that are currently killing people. The entire old world order of things will be repealed (Revelation 21:4). So obviously that's what we should be hoping for when we ask God to bring his kingdom.
But, there's another whole side to this kingdom thing. We really like the loving and comforting part (as well we should), so it's easy to get stuck there. On the other hand, here's what got me thinking about this whole kingdom issue in the first place:
The other thing we're talking about when we ask for God's kingdom, whether we know it or not, is his majesty and power. This is why just saying the words is potentially dangerous. We need, as Psalm 34 says, to be taught the fear of the Lord.
Think about it like this: Imagine that you lived sometime in the Middle Ages, and you were a swordsmith (because that would be a pretty sweet job). One day, the king of the whole land shows up at your shop with his heavily armed royal bodyguards and tells you to make him a royal sword. What would you do? I have a feeling you would drop what you were doing and make it as soon as you could. There wouldn't be any other choice. You wouldn't, I imagine, be saying anything like, "Well, I have a lot of other work coming in... busiest season of the year, you know... and I really should be taking some time to myself to relax, if that will even be possible with all the housework I have to do... but I would like to help, so maybe I can fit it in around the end of the month" or anything else like that. You'd be firing up the furnace and asking for the specifications. See where I'm going with this?
It's funny that we have to go back so far to the Middle Ages to conjure up an image of a king with that kind of power. In that day, you just didn't argue with royalty. I wonder why we think God would be any different than that. Why in the world do we think we have any choice in the matter of what he tells us to do? This is THE King we're talking about, the Lord Almighty, from whom angels hide their faces. Angels whose voices shake the earth. Imagine what happens when the King himself speaks! No wonder Isaiah said he was ruined. I bet he was pretty sure he had no right to live.
The next thing that happened to him, though, is that God cleansed him from guilt and blessed him. Here's the thing: that same mighty, fearsome King is the one who loves us. And, "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment" (1 John 4:18). So where does the fear of the Lord come in? I know we get all excited about the coming blessings of the kingdom, but God doesn't change (James 1:17). He is still the King, high and exalted, seated on the throne as well. How can we reconcile these things and relate to him in the proper way?
I see it something like this. If you think back to my swordsmith analogy, I said that he didn't have any choice about following the king's orders. The king holds the power of life and death, so obviously arguing with him is a bad idea. But, good kings don't derive their power from threats. They are respected for their wise and caring rule and hold the power of command by virtue of that. If it was a good king in my analogy, he probably wouldn't have killed the poor ridiculous swordsmith if he turned down the king's request. He would, however, have taken the huge pile of gold he was waiting to give the swordsmith for the sword and taken it to someone who would do his will.
So, what does it mean to fear the Lord? If he loves us perfectly as his children (which he does, in case you were wondering), it's not a question of punishment, like if the king had his bodyguards kill the recalcitrant sword maker. God just doesn't sit in Heaven with lightning bolts waiting to zap us. Thing is, he doesn't want or need to. Psalm 37:17 says that "the Lord upholds the righteous." If he is constantly holding our world together with his hand of blessing, I think that's a position worthy of respect. But, he gives us the freedom to turn him down. As much as it breaks his heart, he will let us push his blessings away by refusing the mission and call that he has for us. What we find, as we turn our backs on the blessings by taking control for ourselves, is that we have plenty enough problems without God shooting lightning at us. All the chaos and confusion we let in will ruin us pretty quickly. God allows it, through his tears, for the purpose of bringing us running back to his hand of blessing. This is discipline, yet another way he loves us.
The fear of God for us as his children, then, is something more like reverence. (For his enemies, it's a whole different story.) For us, it's not so much that we have to worry about being smited (and yes, I know the correct word is smitten) but that we have great respect for the all-powerful force of blessing that runs our lives. It would obviously be idiotic for us to attempt to live in the dangerous land outside that protection, but it's still something we tend to do. We give the King, the Lord Almighty, all kinds of reasons why his blessing isn't quite as good or important as the other things we've got going on. And, he respects our wishes with what I can only imagine is some type of sorrowful disbelief. "You want what instead of me?"
Incidentally, this attitude on our parts probably has a lot to do with why non-Christians look at us and don't especially want what we have. If we spend our time actively running away from the blessings we are offering, why would anyone else want them? If we won't live like there's a living King in the land, why would anyone else believe it? I mean, if God is real and he is the all-powerful force of blessing we say he is, then we owe him everything. Everything. All of it, all the time, no matter what. Time, money, jobs, relationships; all his. All subject to his leading, every moment spent in his service. If we lived like that instead of like The World Lite™, then maybe more people would realize the truth. In fact, it would be impossible for them to avoid.
So, let's not be naïve when we pray "your kingdom come." We definitely want and should ask for the blessings that are part of God's kingdom: tears being dried, healing from sickness, etc. But why do we think we should just pray about something we're supposed to have a part in doing? How do we expect to gain the blessings of the kingdom without submitting to God's rule? If we want God's kingdom to come, maybe we should think about living like he is the King.
What are we really saying when we say "your kingdom come" ? Well, first of all, God's kingdom when fully revealed will be the place of ultimate peace. There won't be any more war, or death, or hurt or crying or anything like that. Sickness will be a thing of the past, as will poverty, racism and any other forces you can think of that are currently killing people. The entire old world order of things will be repealed (Revelation 21:4). So obviously that's what we should be hoping for when we ask God to bring his kingdom.
But, there's another whole side to this kingdom thing. We really like the loving and comforting part (as well we should), so it's easy to get stuck there. On the other hand, here's what got me thinking about this whole kingdom issue in the first place:
"In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: with two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another: 'Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory.' At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke. 'Woe to me!' I cried. 'I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty." (Isaiah 6:1-5)
The other thing we're talking about when we ask for God's kingdom, whether we know it or not, is his majesty and power. This is why just saying the words is potentially dangerous. We need, as Psalm 34 says, to be taught the fear of the Lord.
Think about it like this: Imagine that you lived sometime in the Middle Ages, and you were a swordsmith (because that would be a pretty sweet job). One day, the king of the whole land shows up at your shop with his heavily armed royal bodyguards and tells you to make him a royal sword. What would you do? I have a feeling you would drop what you were doing and make it as soon as you could. There wouldn't be any other choice. You wouldn't, I imagine, be saying anything like, "Well, I have a lot of other work coming in... busiest season of the year, you know... and I really should be taking some time to myself to relax, if that will even be possible with all the housework I have to do... but I would like to help, so maybe I can fit it in around the end of the month" or anything else like that. You'd be firing up the furnace and asking for the specifications. See where I'm going with this?
It's funny that we have to go back so far to the Middle Ages to conjure up an image of a king with that kind of power. In that day, you just didn't argue with royalty. I wonder why we think God would be any different than that. Why in the world do we think we have any choice in the matter of what he tells us to do? This is THE King we're talking about, the Lord Almighty, from whom angels hide their faces. Angels whose voices shake the earth. Imagine what happens when the King himself speaks! No wonder Isaiah said he was ruined. I bet he was pretty sure he had no right to live.
The next thing that happened to him, though, is that God cleansed him from guilt and blessed him. Here's the thing: that same mighty, fearsome King is the one who loves us. And, "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment" (1 John 4:18). So where does the fear of the Lord come in? I know we get all excited about the coming blessings of the kingdom, but God doesn't change (James 1:17). He is still the King, high and exalted, seated on the throne as well. How can we reconcile these things and relate to him in the proper way?
I see it something like this. If you think back to my swordsmith analogy, I said that he didn't have any choice about following the king's orders. The king holds the power of life and death, so obviously arguing with him is a bad idea. But, good kings don't derive their power from threats. They are respected for their wise and caring rule and hold the power of command by virtue of that. If it was a good king in my analogy, he probably wouldn't have killed the poor ridiculous swordsmith if he turned down the king's request. He would, however, have taken the huge pile of gold he was waiting to give the swordsmith for the sword and taken it to someone who would do his will.
So, what does it mean to fear the Lord? If he loves us perfectly as his children (which he does, in case you were wondering), it's not a question of punishment, like if the king had his bodyguards kill the recalcitrant sword maker. God just doesn't sit in Heaven with lightning bolts waiting to zap us. Thing is, he doesn't want or need to. Psalm 37:17 says that "the Lord upholds the righteous." If he is constantly holding our world together with his hand of blessing, I think that's a position worthy of respect. But, he gives us the freedom to turn him down. As much as it breaks his heart, he will let us push his blessings away by refusing the mission and call that he has for us. What we find, as we turn our backs on the blessings by taking control for ourselves, is that we have plenty enough problems without God shooting lightning at us. All the chaos and confusion we let in will ruin us pretty quickly. God allows it, through his tears, for the purpose of bringing us running back to his hand of blessing. This is discipline, yet another way he loves us.
The fear of God for us as his children, then, is something more like reverence. (For his enemies, it's a whole different story.) For us, it's not so much that we have to worry about being smited (and yes, I know the correct word is smitten) but that we have great respect for the all-powerful force of blessing that runs our lives. It would obviously be idiotic for us to attempt to live in the dangerous land outside that protection, but it's still something we tend to do. We give the King, the Lord Almighty, all kinds of reasons why his blessing isn't quite as good or important as the other things we've got going on. And, he respects our wishes with what I can only imagine is some type of sorrowful disbelief. "You want what instead of me?"
Incidentally, this attitude on our parts probably has a lot to do with why non-Christians look at us and don't especially want what we have. If we spend our time actively running away from the blessings we are offering, why would anyone else want them? If we won't live like there's a living King in the land, why would anyone else believe it? I mean, if God is real and he is the all-powerful force of blessing we say he is, then we owe him everything. Everything. All of it, all the time, no matter what. Time, money, jobs, relationships; all his. All subject to his leading, every moment spent in his service. If we lived like that instead of like The World Lite™, then maybe more people would realize the truth. In fact, it would be impossible for them to avoid.
So, let's not be naïve when we pray "your kingdom come." We definitely want and should ask for the blessings that are part of God's kingdom: tears being dried, healing from sickness, etc. But why do we think we should just pray about something we're supposed to have a part in doing? How do we expect to gain the blessings of the kingdom without submitting to God's rule? If we want God's kingdom to come, maybe we should think about living like he is the King.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Entertainment vs. Glory
As it turns out, my thoughts on video games (see previous entry) were only the tip of a much larger iceberg. The larger category, I'm coming to see, is the idea of entertainment in general. We have so many ways as a society to distract our minds and keep ourselves from having to think meaningful thoughts. It seems like we are endlessly trying to amuse ourselves. We run from silence like the plague and constantly need more and more activities to fill up our "leisure time."
Why?
Before I get there, let me take a step back and talk about my personal journey a bit. Up until last week, for the past year or so I'd been feeling this nameless frustration in my spirit. The best way I can think of to describe it is that my soul, if you could hear it, would sound like a car trying to start but failing. Some real churning was going on, but it seemed that no progress was being made, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out why this was happening. It was like a fire was burning inside me, but it was only getting barely enough oxygen to keep burning. Ever felt like that?
Anyway, I tried to pray about it a little, but I didn't feel like I was getting anywhere. So, probably because a lot of aspects of my life were still going well, I basically just tried to put it out of my mind. That's where video games come in, because they have been my trademark method of putting things out of my mind for pretty much my whole life. In essence I just closed my ears and eyes and ran to entertainment, which had always been enough to distract me in the past.
This time, though, it wasn't working. I couldn't distract myself with schoolwork, with sports, or with entertainment. The more I tried, the more I was left thinking that my life didn't really make sense. Everything kind of came to a boiling point once I graduated from college this spring. Suddenly I had all this free time and no idea what to fill it with. What I ended up filling it with was pretty much nothing, at least nothing of real value.
Finally, the Lord just blew through all of my crap and spoke to me. I was at a baseball game in Chicago with my parents, and God drew my attention to a few middle-aged guys who were sitting around us. Each of them had downed like six beers (at $6.50 a pop, I might add) and they were sitting there in a semi-incoherent state, alternating between watching the game and watching two fairly inappropriately dressed women sitting near them. God just said, "Is that who you want to be?"
The next day, we got home from Chicago in time for me to go to the Saturday night service at the Cleveland House of Prayer (also known as C-hop. If you've never been there, you really should check it out: http://www.clevelandhop.org/ ). Anyway, the message and worship were all about seeing the beauty and glory of the Lord, how God is surpassingly great, the best thing we could chase after. It was all stuff I thought I had heard before, but this time God really made me hear it and revealed himself to me in a new way. He challenged a lot of how I had been spending my time, and he showed me a much better plan.
See, here's why my life wasn't making any sense: I had been saying that God was awesome and glorious and great, but I was spending my time on so much other stuff. I said the right things, but my life showed that I was looking for glory in the wrong places. That night, though, God showed me a glimpse of His glory. To be honest, it made all the things I had entertained myself with look really pathetic in comparison. I felt like so much of my life had been a total waste. I understood in a much deeper way this thing the apostle Paul said: "Whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him..." (Philippians 3:7-9).
Knowing Jesus was the one thing that held any satisfaction whatsoever for Paul. The rest, he was ready to toss out the window. It's kind of like how Mary sat at Jesus feet and Jesus said that was the "one thing" that was needed. It's a lot like how David said, "One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple" (Psalm 27:4). In fact, it's exactly like that.
So, back to the question of entertainment and distraction. The question, as you may remember, was "why?" The answer, as far as I can tell from these verses, is that we haven't seen enough of the glory of the Lord. What did David want? To see, to gaze at, the glory of God! As he did that, it became the only thing he had any desire for. As a friend of mine said to me recently, God is God and we're just creatures, so life is obviously about him, not us. So basically, if we still have this insatiable desire for our own entertainment, it just means we haven't seen enough of God's glory yet.
Why entertainment? Because we haven't had a revelation of the glory of God.
The thing is, we can't make it happen. A revelation has to be revealed. God has to show us his glory, and we can't force him to. But, he does promise this: "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart" (Jeremiah 29:13). If we make him our "one thing," he promises that we will see his glory in a way that makes everything else pale in comparison.
It's not a one time deal either: God revealed himself to me through the teaching and worship that night at C-hop, but even though it was a turning point for me, that one night won't be enough to keep me going for the rest of my life. I need "to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord," to stare at it, burn it into my eyes, and just overall to keep on looking at it. That's what will make my life make sense and keep me going, not entertainment or any other pursuit except Jesus and knowing him more. And for that to happen, I need God to reveal it to me. I sure didn't find him, because I was looking in the wrong places. He found me. That's why He is the one thing I ask for, that I would meet him where his glory dwells.
Will you ask God to reveal his all-surpassing glory to you? If he does (and he will), you'll never ask for anything else.
Why?
Before I get there, let me take a step back and talk about my personal journey a bit. Up until last week, for the past year or so I'd been feeling this nameless frustration in my spirit. The best way I can think of to describe it is that my soul, if you could hear it, would sound like a car trying to start but failing. Some real churning was going on, but it seemed that no progress was being made, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out why this was happening. It was like a fire was burning inside me, but it was only getting barely enough oxygen to keep burning. Ever felt like that?
Anyway, I tried to pray about it a little, but I didn't feel like I was getting anywhere. So, probably because a lot of aspects of my life were still going well, I basically just tried to put it out of my mind. That's where video games come in, because they have been my trademark method of putting things out of my mind for pretty much my whole life. In essence I just closed my ears and eyes and ran to entertainment, which had always been enough to distract me in the past.
This time, though, it wasn't working. I couldn't distract myself with schoolwork, with sports, or with entertainment. The more I tried, the more I was left thinking that my life didn't really make sense. Everything kind of came to a boiling point once I graduated from college this spring. Suddenly I had all this free time and no idea what to fill it with. What I ended up filling it with was pretty much nothing, at least nothing of real value.
Finally, the Lord just blew through all of my crap and spoke to me. I was at a baseball game in Chicago with my parents, and God drew my attention to a few middle-aged guys who were sitting around us. Each of them had downed like six beers (at $6.50 a pop, I might add) and they were sitting there in a semi-incoherent state, alternating between watching the game and watching two fairly inappropriately dressed women sitting near them. God just said, "Is that who you want to be?"
The next day, we got home from Chicago in time for me to go to the Saturday night service at the Cleveland House of Prayer (also known as C-hop. If you've never been there, you really should check it out: http://www.clevelandhop.org/ ). Anyway, the message and worship were all about seeing the beauty and glory of the Lord, how God is surpassingly great, the best thing we could chase after. It was all stuff I thought I had heard before, but this time God really made me hear it and revealed himself to me in a new way. He challenged a lot of how I had been spending my time, and he showed me a much better plan.
See, here's why my life wasn't making any sense: I had been saying that God was awesome and glorious and great, but I was spending my time on so much other stuff. I said the right things, but my life showed that I was looking for glory in the wrong places. That night, though, God showed me a glimpse of His glory. To be honest, it made all the things I had entertained myself with look really pathetic in comparison. I felt like so much of my life had been a total waste. I understood in a much deeper way this thing the apostle Paul said: "Whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him..." (Philippians 3:7-9).
Knowing Jesus was the one thing that held any satisfaction whatsoever for Paul. The rest, he was ready to toss out the window. It's kind of like how Mary sat at Jesus feet and Jesus said that was the "one thing" that was needed. It's a lot like how David said, "One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple" (Psalm 27:4). In fact, it's exactly like that.
So, back to the question of entertainment and distraction. The question, as you may remember, was "why?" The answer, as far as I can tell from these verses, is that we haven't seen enough of the glory of the Lord. What did David want? To see, to gaze at, the glory of God! As he did that, it became the only thing he had any desire for. As a friend of mine said to me recently, God is God and we're just creatures, so life is obviously about him, not us. So basically, if we still have this insatiable desire for our own entertainment, it just means we haven't seen enough of God's glory yet.
Why entertainment? Because we haven't had a revelation of the glory of God.
The thing is, we can't make it happen. A revelation has to be revealed. God has to show us his glory, and we can't force him to. But, he does promise this: "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart" (Jeremiah 29:13). If we make him our "one thing," he promises that we will see his glory in a way that makes everything else pale in comparison.
It's not a one time deal either: God revealed himself to me through the teaching and worship that night at C-hop, but even though it was a turning point for me, that one night won't be enough to keep me going for the rest of my life. I need "to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord," to stare at it, burn it into my eyes, and just overall to keep on looking at it. That's what will make my life make sense and keep me going, not entertainment or any other pursuit except Jesus and knowing him more. And for that to happen, I need God to reveal it to me. I sure didn't find him, because I was looking in the wrong places. He found me. That's why He is the one thing I ask for, that I would meet him where his glory dwells.
Will you ask God to reveal his all-surpassing glory to you? If he does (and he will), you'll never ask for anything else.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Video Games
Recently, I've been reflecting a lot on the course of my life so far, i.e. the things I've done and the reasons for them. It's an interesting process, as well as a good checkup to see if you're growing or not, and I highly recommend it. Anyway, one of the the things I've come to see is that I have really spent an inordinate amount of my life so far playing video games. Anything from Minesweeper to Super Smash Brothers, you name it and I've probably been hooked on it. I suppose I could call myself a recovering addict.
It all got me thinking though: why do these games have such a powerful pull on some of us? What draws us so far into them that it's hard to see the way out? In my pondering these questions, I've come up with three reasons I think that people often run to video games, all of which lead me to the same conclusion.
First of all, I think one of the main draws of video games is just plain and simple distraction. Games are fun (and often mindless), whereas real life is often difficult and sometimes not that enjoyable. If real life sucks, then the draw of a fantasy world is even more powerful. It becomes an escape, a fictional place you can enter and lose track of time and worries. As a side note, this could be why time seems to pass much differently (read: faster) while playing video games, as anyone who has played them even a little could tell you. It's almost like they really do create a different reality.
Second, video games are powerful, both emotionally and chemically. You might have thought I was speaking a little strongly when I called myself a recovering addict, but the reality of this situation is pretty disturbing. You've probably heard of people who are addicted to gambling, people who lose all their money but can't seem to stop gambling it away even as it destroys their lives. Well, video game addiction is like the socially acceptable stepsister of that. Studies have shown that successfully completing objectives in video games releases the same chemicals in the same areas of the brain that are present in gambling addicts. It really is possible to become chemically dependent on these games! I'm not saying that I am/was or anything, but I know the adrenaline rush of accomplishing some ridiculously hard objective in a game. For those unfamiliar with the feeling, I'll just say that it gives a very real sense of satisfaction and fulfillment, but one that is totally unwarranted. The reason it's unwarranted, obviously, is that the accomplishment took place in an imaginary world and has no lasting impact on anything, but the feeling can still fool you into a false sense of importance. It's easy to see how you could easily have your whole life wrapped up in this fulfillment.
Finally and most important, I think people play video games because they want control. I saw an advertisement the other day for something on a video game website that showed some fictional beasts battling at the direction of a cloaked figure in the background. At the end of the flash animation, the slogan for this particular product popped up: "Here, I rule." It hit me right away that this ad was only unique in that it was stating explicitly what other ads usually leave to the imagination. And honestly, what better way to market a game to adolescents could there be? This generation of young people finds itself completely powerless against the forces tearing it apart: divorce, abuse, neglect... and the list goes on. Then along comes a product that promises that whatever may be going on in other aspects of your life, here in this one little zone you can have complete control, can be a champion, can dominate those who try to limit you. It's almost irresistible.
I'd be letting a lot of people unfairly off the hook, though, if I said that this phenomenon only applies to hurting teens or adolescent dreamers. The truth is, a lot of adults are hooked on video games too, because all of us have this twisted desire for control. For us, it's just a different set of problems that we're trying to dodge: finances, responsibilities we don't want, and even the emotional brokenness due to the problems on the young person list above, among others. These problems can be avoided in many different ways, of course, but video games are just a blatant example of how we try to take control. I mean, what are those things we use to play video games called? You guessed it: controllers.
Now, the big problem with control is, in essence, that it kills us. We were never designed to have it, and when we do have it we invariably use it to mess up our lives in ways more creative and painful than we can ever foresee. I know I've done this all too often, but I don't know if I ever realized it was because I was trying to fulfill a role that I don't have the capacity to carry out. Paul puts it this way: "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body" (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Simply stated, we don't belong to ourselves. We were made to be vessels of God's glory, nothing more. So when we try to take control (i.e. give ourselves the glory), it doesn't work. It always backfires, and what's worse, it dirties up God's temple.
The good news is that there's an easy way to solve this problem, at least as it applies to video games: turn them off. It's funny, but if I'm going to be honest, I've been afraid for years that God was going to make me stop playing video games and "take all my fun away." But as I start to see what they've been doing to me all this time (distracting me from real life, addicting me, and making me more controlling, thereby stealing God's glory), I see that I won't really be missing out on anything if I never play another one. They just don't compare to the glory of God and the love he has for me. More on that topic is soon to come, but for now I'd encourage everyone to ask God what controllers of your life need to be placed in his hands. Granted, it's a bit of a risky prayer, but I think those are God's favorites. After all, what is a risk but a way that we step out of our own control? Just on the other side of those risks, he has freedom for us that we can't even imagine...
It all got me thinking though: why do these games have such a powerful pull on some of us? What draws us so far into them that it's hard to see the way out? In my pondering these questions, I've come up with three reasons I think that people often run to video games, all of which lead me to the same conclusion.
First of all, I think one of the main draws of video games is just plain and simple distraction. Games are fun (and often mindless), whereas real life is often difficult and sometimes not that enjoyable. If real life sucks, then the draw of a fantasy world is even more powerful. It becomes an escape, a fictional place you can enter and lose track of time and worries. As a side note, this could be why time seems to pass much differently (read: faster) while playing video games, as anyone who has played them even a little could tell you. It's almost like they really do create a different reality.
Second, video games are powerful, both emotionally and chemically. You might have thought I was speaking a little strongly when I called myself a recovering addict, but the reality of this situation is pretty disturbing. You've probably heard of people who are addicted to gambling, people who lose all their money but can't seem to stop gambling it away even as it destroys their lives. Well, video game addiction is like the socially acceptable stepsister of that. Studies have shown that successfully completing objectives in video games releases the same chemicals in the same areas of the brain that are present in gambling addicts. It really is possible to become chemically dependent on these games! I'm not saying that I am/was or anything, but I know the adrenaline rush of accomplishing some ridiculously hard objective in a game. For those unfamiliar with the feeling, I'll just say that it gives a very real sense of satisfaction and fulfillment, but one that is totally unwarranted. The reason it's unwarranted, obviously, is that the accomplishment took place in an imaginary world and has no lasting impact on anything, but the feeling can still fool you into a false sense of importance. It's easy to see how you could easily have your whole life wrapped up in this fulfillment.
Finally and most important, I think people play video games because they want control. I saw an advertisement the other day for something on a video game website that showed some fictional beasts battling at the direction of a cloaked figure in the background. At the end of the flash animation, the slogan for this particular product popped up: "Here, I rule." It hit me right away that this ad was only unique in that it was stating explicitly what other ads usually leave to the imagination. And honestly, what better way to market a game to adolescents could there be? This generation of young people finds itself completely powerless against the forces tearing it apart: divorce, abuse, neglect... and the list goes on. Then along comes a product that promises that whatever may be going on in other aspects of your life, here in this one little zone you can have complete control, can be a champion, can dominate those who try to limit you. It's almost irresistible.
I'd be letting a lot of people unfairly off the hook, though, if I said that this phenomenon only applies to hurting teens or adolescent dreamers. The truth is, a lot of adults are hooked on video games too, because all of us have this twisted desire for control. For us, it's just a different set of problems that we're trying to dodge: finances, responsibilities we don't want, and even the emotional brokenness due to the problems on the young person list above, among others. These problems can be avoided in many different ways, of course, but video games are just a blatant example of how we try to take control. I mean, what are those things we use to play video games called? You guessed it: controllers.
Now, the big problem with control is, in essence, that it kills us. We were never designed to have it, and when we do have it we invariably use it to mess up our lives in ways more creative and painful than we can ever foresee. I know I've done this all too often, but I don't know if I ever realized it was because I was trying to fulfill a role that I don't have the capacity to carry out. Paul puts it this way: "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body" (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Simply stated, we don't belong to ourselves. We were made to be vessels of God's glory, nothing more. So when we try to take control (i.e. give ourselves the glory), it doesn't work. It always backfires, and what's worse, it dirties up God's temple.
The good news is that there's an easy way to solve this problem, at least as it applies to video games: turn them off. It's funny, but if I'm going to be honest, I've been afraid for years that God was going to make me stop playing video games and "take all my fun away." But as I start to see what they've been doing to me all this time (distracting me from real life, addicting me, and making me more controlling, thereby stealing God's glory), I see that I won't really be missing out on anything if I never play another one. They just don't compare to the glory of God and the love he has for me. More on that topic is soon to come, but for now I'd encourage everyone to ask God what controllers of your life need to be placed in his hands. Granted, it's a bit of a risky prayer, but I think those are God's favorites. After all, what is a risk but a way that we step out of our own control? Just on the other side of those risks, he has freedom for us that we can't even imagine...
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Qualifications
Recently, the process of trying to find a job has gotten me thinking about what qualifications I actually have as I've attempted to list them in my resumé. I've realized that there are some real, concrete things about me that qualify me to do certain jobs and not others. When it comes to doing God's work, though, I often feel so unqualified. I can't really understand why it is that God would want to have me even attempt to serve him, given my great propensity for messing things up. Too often, the person doing ministry one minute is off ignoring God's voice in some sinful pattern the next and then thinking "surely if the people in charge/people that I minister to knew how I really am, they wouldn't let me serve them... surely there's someone more qualified." If I can't even hold my own life together, how am I supposed to make an impact on my city? my church? my family?
I guess you could call that kind of feeling desperation.
Here's what I mean: in order for my life to avoid crumbling into chaos, despair and failure, I am constantly in need of God's miraculous intervention. He has to hold it together, not me, because I can't. That may sound like kind of a downer, but the funny thing about it, I'm coming to see, is that this is exactly how God wants us to feel. I think he's constantly leading us to a place of desperation for him, whether we like it or not. And just so you know I'm not making this up, check out the book of 2 Corinthians: the whole thing is about this! Paul is trying to give us this doctrine of desperation throughout this whole letter. Some highlights:
1:8-9--"We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead."
I find it very comforting that the greatest missionary in history despaired of life at some points along the way. Even he needed to learn not to rely on himself. Now, I'm not saying that the hardships of my life are comparable to Paul's, but this is still so cool: God uses our hardships to free us from the burden we put on ourselves of having to make everything work out all the time. That's his job, and he can handle it. He does, after all, raise the dead.
3:4-6--"Such confidence as this is ours through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant."
Simply put, God qualifies us to do his work. Not anything about us or our quantifiable job skills or gifts. God is not about resumés. The only reason we get to do his ministry is because he says so. This also frees us from having to worry what people think about it. God said it, so we do it, whether we feel qualified for it or not. Another point about that: we have no business questioning God's call on us. We might not understand why he has chosen us, but it's really none of our business. We don't earn it. I can't say that enough times.
4:7--"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us."
A crucial point: being desperate for God relieves us of any glory that might come as we follow him. What we do is only a result of his power, and we are just broken, dirty vessels. It's a good thing we don't have to carry the glory, because we can't handle it. It goes straight to our heads and we forget our place all too easily. Our overwhelming imperfections, though, make it obvious that God is the only one who accomplishes anything. As Isaiah said, "all that we have accomplished you have done for us" (Isaiah 26:12).
12:9--"But he [God] said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"
These words of God to Paul really sum up the whole thing: God uses our brokenness to highlight his power. Therefore, we actually get stronger by making ourselves weaker and relying on God's power. As Paul is forced to conclude, "when I am weak, then I am strong." (12:10).
The challenge, then, is learning to rest in the knowledge that we aren't perfect and never will be in this life. We can choose to be depressed about this, or we can choose to minimize ourselves and rely on God to give us good and perfect gifts and to be strong through us. This strength is the kind we need to change a broken city, not whatever pitiful power we can muster up on our own. He qualifies us to do it, and who can argue with God? I don't know why he would choose me out of the many options, I just know he did. I'll finish with a poem I wrote about that and about learning to rest at God's feet despite everything else, being weak but relying on his strength. So enjoy, and also check out the "poem of the day" from the Library of Congress newly added over on the right--I told you more poetry was coming! I also know it's risky putting my poems in such close proximity to those of the masters: please don't compare the two, just enjoy each one for what it's worth. Here's mine:
One Among Many
Under a tolling fog,
in the speckled mist,
answer the question soaking you
gently as you are unaware
who is calling—
Dampening wind
reaching around umbrellas, under hoods
slanted in momentary hesitation
pointing in one direction,
soon forsaking stillness—
Listen through the footsteps,
over the engines; wait
alone in the reverberation
of small voices fading
for the one who asks—
Hear what you can,
see only what you cannot,
and there on the hill
inside the fog
rest.
I guess you could call that kind of feeling desperation.
Here's what I mean: in order for my life to avoid crumbling into chaos, despair and failure, I am constantly in need of God's miraculous intervention. He has to hold it together, not me, because I can't. That may sound like kind of a downer, but the funny thing about it, I'm coming to see, is that this is exactly how God wants us to feel. I think he's constantly leading us to a place of desperation for him, whether we like it or not. And just so you know I'm not making this up, check out the book of 2 Corinthians: the whole thing is about this! Paul is trying to give us this doctrine of desperation throughout this whole letter. Some highlights:
1:8-9--"We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead."
I find it very comforting that the greatest missionary in history despaired of life at some points along the way. Even he needed to learn not to rely on himself. Now, I'm not saying that the hardships of my life are comparable to Paul's, but this is still so cool: God uses our hardships to free us from the burden we put on ourselves of having to make everything work out all the time. That's his job, and he can handle it. He does, after all, raise the dead.
3:4-6--"Such confidence as this is ours through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant."
Simply put, God qualifies us to do his work. Not anything about us or our quantifiable job skills or gifts. God is not about resumés. The only reason we get to do his ministry is because he says so. This also frees us from having to worry what people think about it. God said it, so we do it, whether we feel qualified for it or not. Another point about that: we have no business questioning God's call on us. We might not understand why he has chosen us, but it's really none of our business. We don't earn it. I can't say that enough times.
4:7--"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us."
A crucial point: being desperate for God relieves us of any glory that might come as we follow him. What we do is only a result of his power, and we are just broken, dirty vessels. It's a good thing we don't have to carry the glory, because we can't handle it. It goes straight to our heads and we forget our place all too easily. Our overwhelming imperfections, though, make it obvious that God is the only one who accomplishes anything. As Isaiah said, "all that we have accomplished you have done for us" (Isaiah 26:12).
12:9--"But he [God] said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"
These words of God to Paul really sum up the whole thing: God uses our brokenness to highlight his power. Therefore, we actually get stronger by making ourselves weaker and relying on God's power. As Paul is forced to conclude, "when I am weak, then I am strong." (12:10).
The challenge, then, is learning to rest in the knowledge that we aren't perfect and never will be in this life. We can choose to be depressed about this, or we can choose to minimize ourselves and rely on God to give us good and perfect gifts and to be strong through us. This strength is the kind we need to change a broken city, not whatever pitiful power we can muster up on our own. He qualifies us to do it, and who can argue with God? I don't know why he would choose me out of the many options, I just know he did. I'll finish with a poem I wrote about that and about learning to rest at God's feet despite everything else, being weak but relying on his strength. So enjoy, and also check out the "poem of the day" from the Library of Congress newly added over on the right--I told you more poetry was coming! I also know it's risky putting my poems in such close proximity to those of the masters: please don't compare the two, just enjoy each one for what it's worth. Here's mine:
One Among Many
Under a tolling fog,
in the speckled mist,
answer the question soaking you
gently as you are unaware
who is calling—
Dampening wind
reaching around umbrellas, under hoods
slanted in momentary hesitation
pointing in one direction,
soon forsaking stillness—
Listen through the footsteps,
over the engines; wait
alone in the reverberation
of small voices fading
for the one who asks—
Hear what you can,
see only what you cannot,
and there on the hill
inside the fog
rest.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Lists and Randomness
As I predicted in my first entry, it turns out that sometimes I don't have much going on in the way of serious or meaningful thoughts. But, this is my blog and I'm free to post whatever random stuff I come up with, so in that spirit I've added some lists to the right-hand sidebar of the blog. I noticed that due to my general long-windedness when talking about serious subjects, there was starting to be a huge chunk of boring white space underneath the information over there on the right, so this is the beginning of my efforts to fix that.
So, the first list is of my favorite (read: most used) websites, sites that I think are exceptionally useful, fun, or well-made. Basically, anything I link to in any of my posts will show up there, so that if you like one of the links in the posts you won't have to go searching through all the entries to find it again. Believe me, this will be much more important someday when there are more than five posts here. (As a side note, I bet that a pretty fair percentage of blogs started on free sites like this never end up with more than, say, 3 posts on them before people quit/lose interest. However, I'm not one to do things like that, and I'm in this for the long haul. Someday there's going to be a heck of a lot of text on this blog, and at that point you really won't want to search through all my rantings to find one stupid link. I'm just planning ahead.)
Second, we have a running update on the bands (in order) that currently find themselves in the honored position of having all their cd's in my main case. This is subject to change based on my whims and tastes, and based on whether I ever have enough money again to buy cd's. All of these artists are very anti-bubble (see previous post) in my mind... a lot of them are Christian bands, but ones that are more outside the Christian system and on the indie side of things. A lot of people will not have heard of a lot of the stuff there, but that's fine by me. Check it out if you want, as it's all quality music first and foremost (and by music, I mean music and lyrics. I find that the music that I really like over a long period of time always has interesting/meaningful words, not just creative instrumentation).
Finally, and probably most controversially, I included a list of my favorite movies ever. Not what I think are necessarily the BEST movies ever, just my favorites (which is an important distinction: otherwise I'd have no justification for having Citizen Kane lower than Mystery Men). And yes, these are generally in order, so you can see my rankings. However, the ranking process was far less than scientific, and it may be prone to gross miscalculations and glaring omissions. Those situations are where you should post a comment and remind me of important movies I may have forgotten and/or campaign for movies you like to be moved up or movies you hate to be moved down the list. I welcome all manner of comments about this.
By the way, this list was created with a great deal of help from IMDb, another amazing website now appearing in the links list. (http://www.imdb.com/) This site is definitely the most comprehensive website on the net for information about movies. Ever see someone in a movie and be like, "I know I've seen him before, who is that??" This website can tell you, in painstaking and beautiful detail. It's fantastic. It also has information on objectionable material, so you can avoid a movie with stuff you don't want to see. In fact, by way of disclaimer, that may come in handy with my list, since even though these movies are very clean for the most part, there's a few movies on there with some stuff that you might want to skip. I know I skip certain parts of some of these movies when I watch them, so don't take my recommendation as proof that there's nothing bad in there. Be wise and skip it. Also, feel free to let me know if there's something you think I should remove from the list.
And with all the lists, feel free to suggest sites/bands/movies that I might like that aren't currently on there. It's always fun to see what other people think is the greatest and why. That's all for now... stay tuned for more poetry coming up soon.
So, the first list is of my favorite (read: most used) websites, sites that I think are exceptionally useful, fun, or well-made. Basically, anything I link to in any of my posts will show up there, so that if you like one of the links in the posts you won't have to go searching through all the entries to find it again. Believe me, this will be much more important someday when there are more than five posts here. (As a side note, I bet that a pretty fair percentage of blogs started on free sites like this never end up with more than, say, 3 posts on them before people quit/lose interest. However, I'm not one to do things like that, and I'm in this for the long haul. Someday there's going to be a heck of a lot of text on this blog, and at that point you really won't want to search through all my rantings to find one stupid link. I'm just planning ahead.)
Second, we have a running update on the bands (in order) that currently find themselves in the honored position of having all their cd's in my main case. This is subject to change based on my whims and tastes, and based on whether I ever have enough money again to buy cd's. All of these artists are very anti-bubble (see previous post) in my mind... a lot of them are Christian bands, but ones that are more outside the Christian system and on the indie side of things. A lot of people will not have heard of a lot of the stuff there, but that's fine by me. Check it out if you want, as it's all quality music first and foremost (and by music, I mean music and lyrics. I find that the music that I really like over a long period of time always has interesting/meaningful words, not just creative instrumentation).
Finally, and probably most controversially, I included a list of my favorite movies ever. Not what I think are necessarily the BEST movies ever, just my favorites (which is an important distinction: otherwise I'd have no justification for having Citizen Kane lower than Mystery Men). And yes, these are generally in order, so you can see my rankings. However, the ranking process was far less than scientific, and it may be prone to gross miscalculations and glaring omissions. Those situations are where you should post a comment and remind me of important movies I may have forgotten and/or campaign for movies you like to be moved up or movies you hate to be moved down the list. I welcome all manner of comments about this.
By the way, this list was created with a great deal of help from IMDb, another amazing website now appearing in the links list. (http://www.imdb.com/) This site is definitely the most comprehensive website on the net for information about movies. Ever see someone in a movie and be like, "I know I've seen him before, who is that??" This website can tell you, in painstaking and beautiful detail. It's fantastic. It also has information on objectionable material, so you can avoid a movie with stuff you don't want to see. In fact, by way of disclaimer, that may come in handy with my list, since even though these movies are very clean for the most part, there's a few movies on there with some stuff that you might want to skip. I know I skip certain parts of some of these movies when I watch them, so don't take my recommendation as proof that there's nothing bad in there. Be wise and skip it. Also, feel free to let me know if there's something you think I should remove from the list.
And with all the lists, feel free to suggest sites/bands/movies that I might like that aren't currently on there. It's always fun to see what other people think is the greatest and why. That's all for now... stay tuned for more poetry coming up soon.
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